Smiles And Sunshine

Worcester Cop On Horseback Nailing Beerpong Shot At Clark Graduation Party Is The Feel Good Video You Need To See This Weekend

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We’ve been pretty critical of the stupid police horses Ed Augustus made the taxpayers cough up the cash for in Worcester. Then this happened at a Clark graduation party:

I’d much rather see this guy shooting from deep than Marcus Smart. Just look at that form. The concentration….

The loft and touch

That’s how you pong right there people. Take notes. It’s all a stats game. The ball has a better chance of going in a cup if gravity is pulling it down as close to a 90 degree angle as possible. Line drives might have a better chance of hitting the actual cup, but that’s how you get rim jobs. And not the fund kind of rim jobs either. I started doing a one-handed, underhanded granny shot by my senior year of college, and it looked ridiculous, and the freshmen laughed at me. But I had the last laugh when they had to drink that warm Icehouse from the three day old red solo cups we found in the basement, each and every time I heard that satisfying splash sound. It’s just such a higher percentage move that it’s a no-brainer.


And the crowd goes wild!!


OK, that was pretty awesome. I guess I like the horses now.

That my friends is community policing in action. A couple years back when Michael Brown was all the rage there were protesters everywhere whining that cops Worcester cops were racist and didn’t care about the community and blah, blah, blah. But in reality the WPD, and every police department I’ve encountered, are just regular guys and gals who would rather do stuff like this than arrest assholes. Technically, playing beerpong outside is probably illegal according to some Worcester ordinance. But the cops aren’t gonna bust your balls if you don’t bust their’s. If you’re having a good time, and you’re not hurting anyone, and you talk to the cops like they’re actual human beings, then they’re not gonna bust your balls. Crazy, I know. But it just might work out for some of you repeat customers.

The only question is, could Rosie O’Donnell’s smoking hot Worcester cop girlfriend hit the shot?

Scissor me timbers!!

P.S. Anyone who still plays with beer in the cups and drinks out of them is a savage. Once you turn 23 you realize you can just put water in the cups and pound beers from an actual clean bottle that doesn’t have filthy ping pong ball dipped in it. Trust me, you still get drunk. You just don’t get the plague with it.

7 Comment(s)
  • Tyranny
    July 26, 2018 at 1:36 pm

    Actually, the cop who hit that shot is named Mike. Grew up in Worcester County. Has been a super nice guy his whole life; so happy to see him as both an adult, and now an authority figure, that he is still has a great sense of humor, a big heart, and a fun spirit. Also, war hero and family man….Go Mike!!!

  • Wabbitt
    May 21, 2018 at 5:36 pm

    Ten bucks says that cop was in the fun frat in college.

  • Frank Rizzo
    May 21, 2018 at 9:55 am

    Sweet Jeezuz, Lesbian or not, how could this WPD smokeshow go for a frikken wildebeast like R.O.. Must be a star struck goldigger lipstick lesbian just like the heterowhores!

  • juror seven esq.
    May 20, 2018 at 5:19 pm

    About the horses, here’s a question. Had to be 6 or 8 weeks back, weekday, mid-morning the horse patrol is out on Woodland St. I’m coming out of Kingsbury St. Remembering my learner’s hand book, I know I’m suppose to give way to the horses and only move forward slowly. No surprise, as I’m approaching, two of the horses do what horse do, drop a load onto Woodland St. So, is it okay to leave the horseshit in the middle of the street or should there be a clean up crew bringing up the rear when the horses are out?

  • Baldo Cuchino
    May 19, 2018 at 4:39 pm

    All I see here are white cops acting like slavemasters to brown horses.

    • Carrots&burntbbq
      May 19, 2018 at 6:22 pm

      Well at least they’re masters at it. If you’re gonna do it, do it right and be the best!

  • NJ Turtlebacker
    May 19, 2018 at 3:00 pm

    . . . . and just like that, Beer Polo is invented in Worcester.

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