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More positive news out of the beautiful land of Southbridge:
Just kidding. Everyone knows the only news out of Southbridge is bad news. But time it’s actually Worcester’s fault. Here’s my question – when did people in Southbridge stop selling weed? Why did they have to call in their heavy hitters from Worcester? You know if Worcester nudniks have to drive to Southbridge there’s a 75% chance your ass is getting robbed to cover the gas money. That’s just science.
Good God though. Just look at this vokestache:
It’s the most Worcester thing I’ve ever seen. He looks like every 16 year old 8th grader I saw at Sullivan Middle School.
Then there’s this winner:
Bro, do you even hardo? You can’t smile in a mugshot like that. Not with that haircut at least. Don’t worry though, “he got this 100 emoji”
Perhaps Danny Boy should’ve been more focused on freeing himself, rather than freeing the homies:
It’s true though. If at least 100 hoodrats write, “free my boi” on Facebook, the police are compelled legally to free them. I learned that in Internet law school.
Here’s the thing though Danny – no one is trying to free you in the comments. Only your coconspirator:
Looks like you’re going to jail.
In all seriousness though, this is what karma looks like for Soutbridge voters. In June Southbridge voters went to the polls and voted AGAINST allowing recreational weed shops in town. So now people in Southbridge who want weed have to call up Worcester’s version of the Spice Girls who then pack 5 hoodboogers into a Honda Civic, sell their shwagg, and then immediately rob the customer at gun point.
But thank God there aren’t any legal pot shops in town!! Those are dangerous!!