All-Star Criminals

Worst Criminals Ever Break Into The Perfect Game, Can’t Figure Out How To Get By Locked Door Inside

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Saw this post on the Perfect Game’s Facebook page yesterday:

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God criminals are dumb. Seriously, what was the plan here for Goofus and Gallant? Because it sure as shit doesn’t look like they had a plan. They’re not wearing gloves or ANYTHING that would mask who they are. One of them is dressed like he’s going to war, and the other one is dressed like he’s about to release a Grafton Hill rap video. It looks like they went through all this trouble to break into the building but apparently left with nothing. So yea, productive night for these two nudniks.

Let’s review the pictures we’ve got here. First, they’re in the basement in a building that is likely alarmed and covered in cameras. Good thing they’re tip-toeing though.


Because everyone knows cameras won’t see you if you walk on your tippy toes.

Then they encounter an unexpected obstacle – a door:


Never saw that one coming. Love how the brains of the operation is wearing camouflage pants. Because camo pants work perfectly when you’re trying to blend into the scenery in the basement of a bar on Water Street.

The next step was pure genius – attempt to open the door:


But alas the door was locked. Didn’t see that one coming. So what did they try to do? What was the big plan? Check and see if they left the key in the mailbox:



Because why wouldn’t the owners keep the key to the locked door in the mailbox? That’s what these two geniuses would do!! The best part is he put the mail back the way he found it:


Wouldn’t want to tip someone off that they were inside the building!!

Once their plan to open the locked door failed they had to move on to plan B – aimlessly walking around to see if anyone left a bag of cash on a shelf:


Little did they know they were being filmed the entire time. So yea, I wonder which one got caught first? A local defense attorney owns the Perfect Game, safe to say these will not be his clients, nor will it be their first or last appearance in Worcester District Court.




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22 Comment(s)
  • Chris Seith
    July 26, 2016 at 8:30 pm


  • BobnMic
    July 25, 2016 at 9:32 pm

    I’m laughing my ass off too Fiesty. Oh that Reddog, what a character. How have you been Fiesty? Have you been thinking about me much and what I texted you when we were still in love?

  • Reddog
    July 25, 2016 at 9:13 pm

    4:30am? Boy,those two must have been tired at work that day.

    • FiestyLawyerLady
      July 25, 2016 at 9:19 pm

      Sarcasm…. gotta love it! Lol

  • The Executioner
    July 25, 2016 at 4:16 pm

    There are very few smart criminals…if there were we would not need so many jail beds for the ignorant and stupid.

  • PG
    July 25, 2016 at 4:10 pm

    The Perfect Game is awful. Horrible experience with multiple staff members 5 years ago. Haven’t been back since, never will.

    • PG
      July 25, 2016 at 7:37 pm

      Now that I think about it, I recall several stories from the past with Perfect Game as the victim of breaking and entering, and they ask social media to help them find the people they catch on camera. Do these chodes invest in an alarm system, or do they just have cameras recording people breaking in, followed by management walking in with their thumbs up their ass so they can post their victim of B&E garbage to social media so they can get reimbursed through insurance while milking free publicity? That would be a feasible defense attorney move to pull.

  • BobnMic
    July 25, 2016 at 4:09 pm

    I was going to say that a local defense attorney owns the place but you had it in your last line of the article. He is a good guy too the owner and I am sure he is psyched that the two numbnuts have been identified aka Dumb and Dumber. Interesting side note, most defense attorneys that I know are very pro law enforcement believe it or not. It’s just that on the defender side is where the money is in criminal or civil law (not public defenders) and we all know that the shitbags of the world in this country are entitled to be represented by legal counsel no matter what.

    So unless you are elected District Attorney or are appointed 1st assistant to the D.A., there is little money being a prosecutor or otherwise known as a A.D.A. But for a lot of attorneys that is how you get your feet wet right out of law school and passing the bar. Get some court time experience, make a name for yourself (hopefully good) then move on toward something more prosperous.

    • FiestyLawyerLady
      July 25, 2016 at 9:54 pm

      You’re wrong here. Marketability is extremely important for an attorney who wishes to transfer from public to private sector. Transitioning into private practice, although common, is extremely difficult for an attorney who is fresh out of law school and knee deep in educational debt. The marketability of any attorney wishing to make such a transition has to be based off of important cases they have handled, and the skills gained by doing so. An experienced prosecutor is usually more marketable to a large law firm than a public defender with less than a decade under the belt. The experienced prosecutors have a hand up and a major advantage.

      You also need to take into account the appeal factor. What transferable skills does said attorney have? Law firms are reluctant to bring in a public servant who has no long list of clients to offer said firm. That would be considered an “invest hire” and a no-go for most big law firms. Do they have skills that can be applied to the private sector job they are applying for? Very hard to match that up unless it’s BIG FIRM or Litigation. Once we discuss litigation, no matter the experience of the prosecutor the law school the attorney graduated from, whether or not they were involved in law review, level and or prestige and power of their current position will always be just as important as experience. That’s because litigation is on the rise in big firms, while corporate and real estate are on the decline.

      Although private sector jobs pay more, they are not as easily obtained by the average newly licensed attorney. Those high paying jobs are usually reserved for an attorney who has paved their way through law school, and perhaps have a few “connections”. A government position almost always offers the attorney job security, less hours, less scrutiny and being watched through a magnifying glass. Also, less competition to make it to the top. Public sector definitely has a revolving doors, but the attorney who leaves that position will have a tremendously difficult job finding a position at a private practice for anything more than what they are already earning. Even if they get paid more, their hours are daunting. Unless you have seniority, the cases are actually quite boring and mundane. This leads to a feeling of being “burned out” too soon. The enormous responsibility placed an attorney who is fresh meat when in a public servant position is high. They get to try cases that are not only significant, but VERY difficult to obtain working in private practice as those cases are usually given to associates/partners not some youngin’ just starting out. Also, the chances of moving to a higher position are much more likely in the public sector than the private.

      Starting off in the public sector and attempting to transition in private is not only intimidating, it is not as easy as you make it out to be. They wouldn’t be getting their feet wet by starting off as an government employee, they would be burying them in cement. Unless of course they take the option of relieving educational debt by working a committed decade for the government. That usually doesn’t happen to any attorney who has incurred more than 75k of law school debt.

      This post was way too serious for me… I don’t like using my brain unless I’m getting some kind of financial benefit out of it. So, let me go back to being Fiesty and say some vulgar shit that makes me look like I have pudding for brains.

      • BobnMic
        July 26, 2016 at 1:00 am

        Very informative and thank you. I kind of thought I was saying nearly the same thing from a layman’s perspective. I do have friends that work both sides of the fence and when we get together occasionally socially it is interesting to hear how they made it or are on the move toward making it.

        And of course as in any profession you may get different points of you. Yours seems pretty spot on but I have heard different slants and who knows maybe there is not one standard set in stone. Much like any other profession I suspect.

      • FiestyLawyerLady
        July 26, 2016 at 8:32 am

        You had 3 likes and all of a sudden have 49… hahaha… You’re weird. Why does it matter so much that you would go through that much trouble? I’m curious because I can’t imagine reloading a blog 97 times to dislike someone’s comment. That’s insane.

    • FiestyLawyerLady
      July 26, 2016 at 8:30 am

      Bob what are you doing?? Did you stay up all night liking and disliking? Lmao… I had 3 dislikes at 1230am which is normal. You’re telling me 97 people read my comment on a blog that is hidden 5 stories down in 6 hours and disliked it? Pathetic….

      I can’t even disagree with you politely you still turn into a psycho.

      • BobnMic
        July 26, 2016 at 9:29 am

        Hello and good morning to you too. My God. So what have I done now according to you? I submitted an observation about the journey of attorneys in their career advancement based on what friends tell me in conversation. You enlightened me on a much more detailed reality of what goes on through your own experiences. Very detailed in fact and I did thank you for that I believe. So what is the problem now I ask?

        So what a bunch of dipshit haters came in and fucked with the thumbs? And you think it was me? Like I really care about thumbs up or down seriously. Are you for real? Look, here is the deal. If I had an opinion about the legal profession whether it be law enforcement or esquires then that it all it is. An opinion. Feel free to disagree. I’m always game for a healthy debate but what you are alleging here is just pure insanity and I actually do feel bad that all those other posts toward you are so nasty. I read them and think now that this blog is going to shit. Oh well what can you do?

        But I must tell you my days of sticking up for you in that regard and being a friend is a ship that has long sailed sister. So once again I ask you to leave me the fuck alone and mind your own business…

        • FiestyLawyerLady
          July 26, 2016 at 9:59 am

          I didn’t even read your reply. You’re bat shit crazy. You literally refreshed an incognito tab 97 times. You don’t get to analyze anyone but yourself.

          Your deep… and I mean REAL DEEP need to feel accepted here is a serious mental issue that should be a serious concern to you. Not everyone in this world is going to like you, and you should start to adjust your life accordingly. You always have a response like you know EVERYTHING on EVERY SUBJECT on this blog. More than half the times you are wrong.

          I mean this in the most serious way possible and I’m not trying to be a sarcastic bitch here, but you really need to question your ability to remain normal when someone doesn’t agree with what you say. You will be a much happier person if you didn’t care about what other people thought of you. I spent a good portion of my early 20s always wondering what people thought of me, it was a sad way to be. I lived to please other people. However, I grew up and realized the the only opinions that mattered are from people I love.

          I’m surprised that you’re in your mid 30s and still can’t break away from the insecurity of having to walk in shadows to avoid being disliked.

          You need to seek counseling. Have a good day.

          • BobnMic
            July 26, 2016 at 10:18 am

            What. Are. You. Talking. About. I did not disagree with your perspective. I thanked you for it. And before you go off again with your crazy rantings – go and read it. Do yourself a favor.

            Man you love to hate…

          • FiestyLawyerLady
            July 26, 2016 at 10:40 am

            Dude. There is NO WAY 97 people clicked on this blog post in 6 hours and disliked my comment. I could see if it was a dumb comment, but it was factual. Do you ever see 100 dislikes on here, EVER?? So, what you mean to tell me is 97 people in the middle of the night from 1am until 7am decided to read this particular post of mine, dislike it, and not one of those 97 people replied to me? Also, the comment that disagreed with yours was disliked 97 times yet, my comment to reddog down below was not?? Also, 97 people clicked on the blog link and didn’t leave a comment ANYWHERE else on the blog? Lol. Wow those are really quiet and sneaky 97 readers! Keep doing the crazy refreshing if it makes you happy Bob. I don’t care, I only brought it up to let you know that I’m aware of your silly games.

            Bye Bob, you’re fucking nuts!

          • BobnMic
            July 26, 2016 at 10:45 am

            Interesting on how you describe me. The more I read it the more it is really you that you are describing in every detail right on down to Ms. know it all. Always trying to be the smarter than anyone else.

            Love the the homicide description or your attempt to define it the other day by the way. A great laugh. You are such a phony and so full of shit it is hilarious. Holy shit you are nutz. I never realized just how much. Now and for the last time – Leave. Me. The. Fuck. Alone.

          • FiestyLawyerLady
            July 26, 2016 at 11:10 am

            What I said in that post was ALSO factual. You Google everything just to post here and pretend to be someone with intelligence. Sad reality.

            It’s apparent you’re full of shit because you know everyone and everything all of the time. Every single one of your posts read that way.


          • BobnMic
            July 27, 2016 at 2:25 am

            Since you did not adhere to my request to leave me the fuck alone earlier today then – Hello again and by the way fuckface you do not start a debate with, “You’re wrong here.” Right away you take the position of none discussion and/or reflection onto the subject at hand. And immediately take a stance that you are right no matter what. Which that is you real problem thinking that you are the smartest person in here and always right. You are laughed at and you do not even know it. Well maybe you do. Look at all of those “C” word comments directed toward you.

            This is the problem with you Feisty, Nicole M., Bob’s crazy, or how many other names you come on here as. You cannot be reasoned with. You are mentally unstable. A fucking nut cake. You fuck with most of the people on here that are just trying to have fun with Turtleboy Sports. You flirt really disgustingly, then do your very best to be some sort of queen bee. And you suck at it. You suck at all of it. Give. It. The. Fuck. Up. And. Go. Away.

            I also love the idiotic stories about you and the Bronx, NY. So is this some sort of an attempt to make you like some sort of bad ass or something? Really? I mean fucking really? Nice try. You’re a wimp and we all know it. Also you are not an attorney and we all know it as well. A fraud true and through is what you are so go fuck yourself you maggot fucking scumbag.

          • FiestyLawyerLady
            July 27, 2016 at 10:42 am

            You can believe whatever you want about me, you have a right to your own opinion now matter how fucking stupid it is.

            I don’t bother anyone on here unless they are trolling. Also, show me ONE post where I flirt with ANYONE on here. Please go all the way back to March when I first starting posting. You won’t find one flirtatious post from me. I’m married and don’t play those games online.

            Go away Bob and stop up voting yourself and down voting others. Fucking pathetic little cry baby pussy.

          • BobnMic
            July 27, 2016 at 10:57 am

            You sort of come off as a troll Fiesty but you can troll me anytime you sexy goddess! Much love and kisses! The real BnM.

          • FiestyLawyerLady
            July 27, 2016 at 12:19 pm


            A+ and a thumbs up for you.

            Seriously though, I only troll the people who troll this blog and people who deserve it… and people who stalk me because their penis feels hurt!

            That’s a long list…

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