Hoodrat Heroes

Albino Crackhead Barbie Previously Featured On TB Is Selling Jewelry With Her Ex-Con Sugar Daddy Who Just Got Out Of Federal Prison And She’s Upset With Our Coverage Of Her Junkie Friend’s Crash With Baby In Backseat


Almost everything covered in this blog was discussed last night on the Live Show. YouTube subscribed always get the content first. Click here to subscribe to our channel and tune in every Tuesday, Thursday, and Saturday night at 9 PM.

Last week we published a couple blogs about the Westerly Wank Wizard who raised $5,500 with a GoFundMe after getting high and crashing into a tree with her baby in the backseat. She responded by sharing a screenshot from a WordPress blog published by a child abusing transgender dude named Ashley who is currently trying to get a restraining order against my whole family in Providence Superior Court.

And according to her I’m a faggot that watches kiddie porn.

So yea, she’s learned absolutely nothing and we likely have not seen the last of her.

However, another person who was supporting her on our IG page went by “Ericha’s Genuine Jewelry.”

Her real name is Ericha Hauser, and she had some more to say about Turtleboy on the Facebook machine in the form of this nonsensical ratchet sentagraph.

OK then.

If the name Ericha with a CH Hauser rings a bell it might be because she’s known around here as the “Westerly Wench Trench, and was featured on a Turtleboy blog in February 2018 after she and her heroin dealing chinstrapped deadbeat dad boyfriend weren’t allowed to buy a dog off their backyard breeder friend because he was going to jail for selling heroin.

She’s back, and skankier than ever!


Fast forward three years and she’s no longer with Justin Varas, the guy who created a GoFundMe in his daughter’s name for cheerleading, wrote it in her voice pretending to be her, and then messaged me a staged video of her lying about creating the GFM herself on his once a month visitation day so that he could fund his heroin habit.

She’s moved onto this guy instead:


That’s Gerry Kent, a man in his mid 50’s who is basically Rhode Island’s version of Feta Cheese Freddie.

As you can see, he looks like every minor character on the Sopranos who didn’t know his place and had way too many opinions about Christopher and the way things operated and ended up getting whacked.

According to Gerry he is always pictured with hot young side pieces because he’s a “legend.”

You may be asking yourself, how did this guy acquire enough money to get all these women to sleep with him and/or pose for pictures to make it look like he was? Well, turns out he defrauded some people out of millions of dollars by pretending to be a legitimate jeweler.

He was sentenced to four years in federal prison for this in 2018, but apparently is out now because four years never actually means four years. David explained how the scheme works last night on the Live show, but basically he pretended to work for Groupon and Zullilly, opened bank accounts in their names, and sold a debt collection company fake invoices for jewelry he never sold, totaling nearly $5 million.

Kent had been doing business with a Chicago-based factoring company, a third party company that offers business capital in exchange for buying unpaid invoices at a discount. He submitted fake invoices to the company that resulted in him receiving payments totaling nearly $5 million dollars. According to the U.S. Attorney’s Office in Rhode Island, in order to pull off this fraud, he created and used a fraudulent copy of Groupon’s website, asked accomplices to pose as Groupon employees, and opened bank accounts in the names of Groupon and Zulily to deceive the debtor finance company into believing it was receiving payments from these companies.

Now he’s out of jail and immediately found an albino crackhead barbie for a girlfriend, and you’ll never guess what she’s selling on Facebook.

Jewelry of course. And she thanked her new sugar Daddy for giving her the push and the confidence to sell her shitty jewelry on Etsy.

Oh, and she’s hiring models now too, including kids.

Who wouldn’t wanna bring their child around a woman who’s been featured multiple times on Turtleboy, is fluent in Ratchetese, and whose last two boyfriends include a heroin dealer and a man who just got out of federal prison?

Anyway, since both of these chicks have a lot to say about me and aren’t shy I would like to officially welcome them to come on the live show Sunday night (Bruins Saturday). If either of you fine young ladies wants to give me a piece of your mind face to face instead of leaving comments on our Instagram, message me on Facebook at Clarence Woods Emerson and we can make that happen.


Hello Turtle Riders. As you know if you follow Turtleboy we are constantly getting censored and banned by Facebook for what are clearly not violations of their terms of service. Twitter has done the same, and trolls mass reported our blog to Google AdSense thousands of times, leading to demonitization. We can get by and survive, but we could really use your help. Please consider donating by hitting the PayPal button above if you’d like support free speech and what we do in the face of Silicon Valley censorship. Or just buy our award winning book about the dangers of censorship and rise of Turtleboy: 


44 Comment(s)
    June 7, 2021 at 2:20 pm

    Gerry looks like a total douche

  • Sweet Polly Purebred
    May 30, 2021 at 12:49 pm

    Her sentence structure is atrocious!

  • TB projecting
    May 29, 2021 at 8:17 pm

    The is nooooooooooooo f ing way Gerry Kent would score with any of those chicks unless he had money or good powder…. kind of like there would be no way Unc you even get a hi from Skanduso without him being her peg publishing pet.
    Ralking about that skank, what ever happened to her?

  • Drok M
    Penis Busted
    May 29, 2021 at 6:05 pm

    Her face just turned me gay!

  • E Pubis Scrotum
    May 29, 2021 at 2:54 pm

    That’s not Gerry Kent….it’s Eddy Money!!

  • Captain Trips
    Tattoos on Women are Fucking Gross
    May 29, 2021 at 9:34 am

    Is that a 3rd degree burn on her left upper arm? She should have that treated.

    What? It’s a tattoo? Oh….

    • Stunt Penis
      May 30, 2021 at 6:41 am

      The phrase “tramp stamp” exists for a reason…

  • Captain Trips
    Captain Trips
    May 29, 2021 at 9:33 am

    Gerry, go get your fucking shinebox

  • Alexander Rich-Shea
    Professor Griff
    May 29, 2021 at 8:07 am

    Hey guys i wrote this story about me and my daddy. Obviously im the girl hahaha!

    Title: Cum inside me father!!

    Lindsay addressed Nicole’s father. “…like we ‘practiced’…take your daughter NOW!”

    Suddenly Nicole’s father thrust his hips upward, driving his steely cock halfway into her pussy. Nicole cried out in shock but met his thrusts with a hard push downward, fully impaling herself on his huge meat-pole.

    “Ohhhhh! Jesus!” she shrieked, delighted as his horse-sized cock hit home. She felt as if the end of it was pressing into her womb. She twisted and shook and tried to raise herself up, to ride him, but her father’s strong hands locked around her hips and held her against his crotch. She lay forward atop him, breasts pressed flat against his chest and grinding her clit against his belly. She was lightheaded, swept away by uncontrollable need.

    “Good,” Lindsay whispered, licking Nicole’s ear. “There’s no drug quite so intoxicating as daddy dick, is there? I can’t recommend it highly enough.”

    Lindsay rose and moved to join her mother in undressing James and Brandon , taking turns caressing and sucking each of their cocks as all four of them continued to watch Nicole and her father.

    Lou slackened his grip on his daughter and she began to rise and fall on his cock. He arched his back to stab deep into her as she pushed down and dropped his hips on to the blanket as she rose up on her toes, maximizing the length of her fuck strokes and depth of his penetration. “Ride my prick, Nicki!” he urged her, gritting his teeth in the effort to hold back his load. “Do it like I taught you, baby!”

    “Oh yes, Daddy!” Nicole trilled. “Oh, I’ve learned so much about fucking since I saw you last. I’m gonna show you everything I’ve learned!”

    Father and daughter fucked in perfect harmony, moving faster with every long stroke. Nicole felt her pussy lips cling to her father’s thick cock as she pulled up, reveling in the heavenly sensation of fullness as she plunged down to take him all the way up her tight wet fuck tunnel. It wasn’t long before the first waves of climax swelled in her pussy.

    “Aaawwwnhhh!” Nicole moaned as she convulsed in a trembling orgasm. She couldn’t stop twitching as every nerve-ending vibrated with nearly unbearable pleasure.

    She must have blacked out then, because her next awareness was of Brandon’s hands on her shoulders lifting her into a sitting position. She was still astride her father, his steely cock still imbedded deep in her pussy. Brandon stood before her, supporting her, his big erection rearing up inches from her face. He was obviously excited by watching his mother fuck her father; pre-cum dripped from his cock slit.

    “Doesn’t that look yummy” Nicole sighed. “Oh, Dad…have you met our son, yet?”

    • Professor Griff (real one)
      May 29, 2021 at 10:21 am

      Do you copy all the other people on here? That’s sad.

      • Alexander Rich-Shea
        Professor Griff (real one)
        May 30, 2021 at 1:02 pm

        What i meant to say is, i like to catch spiders and bit their legs off one by one. I go to the park and take pictures of children and then write stories about torturing them in my basement. It helps me pass the time while my brothers rape me after dinner. At least if i dont scream they let me lick their assholes clean after they shit.

        There’s nothing more delicious than my brother’s hot shit covered furry ass hole

    • Hu Fartted
      Dirt Devil
      May 29, 2021 at 12:54 pm

      Is that Bernie Sanders’ contribution to the comments?

  • John Galt
    May 29, 2021 at 6:56 am

    Sometimes this blog is just depressing, The amount of immoral misfits who festoon their antisocial media with preachy, dime-store philosophy quotes, pervs, self-appointed SJWs, and criminal lowlifes tests my belief in the viability of mankind and wish for nuclear war.

    This is yet another of those stories. The only saving grace is the uncensored comments as ugly as they can be,

  • Bob Murchison
    May 28, 2021 at 11:32 pm

    I would allow her to pinch a Snickers bar on my chest.

  • Hunter Scangerella
    May 28, 2021 at 9:19 pm

    I blew that guy behind the KFC in ‘01.

    • Dees nutz
      May 28, 2021 at 10:36 pm

      did you atleast cup his balls
      ?! be a gentleman….

  • Sarah Prager / Addison Brown
    May 28, 2021 at 9:07 pm

    Would and Would.

    #drenched #Moist

  • Barney Fraak
    May 28, 2021 at 8:28 pm

    Gerry Kent looks hot with his chest exposed, does anyone have his number.

  • Linda Coralyn
    Done with this shit
    May 28, 2021 at 7:19 pm

    Did this person have a stroke? Why is his/her writing all fucked up?

  • Sir Jinx
    May 28, 2021 at 7:06 pm

    I would definitely use a condom with her.

    • Professor Griff
      May 28, 2021 at 9:07 pm

      She probably smells, even after taking a shower. Only drug addicts can do it with her, as they smell alike. Good luck getting it up.

  • Nigtastic
    May 28, 2021 at 6:53 pm

    Mud sharks never learn

  • Bill Clinton
    May 28, 2021 at 5:34 pm

    I wouldn’t mind motorboating them titties

    • Chris Tranos
      May 28, 2021 at 6:47 pm

      be careful Ericha has crabs

  • Carl Hauser
    May 28, 2021 at 4:59 pm

    Get your ASS to Mars!

    • Quaid
      May 28, 2021 at 6:50 pm

      Hauser was an arse hole!

    • Doogie Hauser
      May 28, 2021 at 6:53 pm

      How Dare You !!!

  • Alexander Rich-Shea
    Alexander Rich-Shea
    May 28, 2021 at 4:31 pm

    I always enjoy TurtleBro’s accounts of his adventures on Instagram

  • Dees nutz
    May 28, 2021 at 4:26 pm

    look up skank in the dictionary and her face pops up. I fucked her in 8th grade and she was already loose back then. her cunt drips like a nose with the flu. what a slut…

  • Judge Dread
    May 28, 2021 at 4:20 pm

    That Gerry Kent is one piece of aye’sh, I know from experience dude.

    • piss flaps pelosi
      May 28, 2021 at 6:49 pm

      the little midget swindler got his asshole enlarged in the pen. fuckiung faggot

      • Piss Flaps Pelosi
        May 30, 2021 at 12:06 pm

        The real piss flaps capitalizes and wouldn’t let a spelling error go unnoticed, You cuck faggot.

  • Enquiring Mind
    May 28, 2021 at 3:39 pm

    Well well well. He didn’t dispute getting arrested in Indiana nor that he was trans. A homely trans for sure. When he came out that Big black Jeffery drove him to attempt suicide I had the immediate suspicion he was conflicted because he himself is a trans testicle.

      May 28, 2021 at 7:29 pm

      Why don’t all you trolls get together and start your own blog? Off the top of my head -losers on parade really seems like a good fit for your blog name. That way, you don’t force yourselves to mingle with people who can spell, don’t believe in defunding police, see blm and racism for the sham it is. You know, people who don’t like you and know you don’t matter.

      • They’re all turtle famous
        May 28, 2021 at 8:52 pm


  • gg allin
    May 28, 2021 at 3:34 pm

    Heroin and social media: a match made in hell.

    • GG RIP
      May 28, 2021 at 5:30 pm

      I knew Jesus (GG) before he was famous and before he would touch anything harder than Molsons . He used to crash at my place when he came down from Manchester to see the Sunday shows at the Channel. His “wife” with the swastika tattoo was nothing but trouble, boy…..

    • Mr. Hanky
      May 28, 2021 at 8:11 pm

      Hidee ho!!!

  • Metro West Guy
    Dick DiBona
    May 28, 2021 at 3:34 pm

    Why do degenerates all look as if they’re distant relatives? It’s that certain immoral glint in their eye and general facial crumminess that turns up in all of them without fail. Case in point – that old man on here with his formal v-neck undershirt and 1988 haircut.

    • WTF
      May 28, 2021 at 3:46 pm

      I too have a 1988 haircut, but at least I’m not a greasy wop.

  • z
    May 28, 2021 at 3:32 pm

    Where is Ray? Gerry is going to need some protection, if ya get my drift …..

  • You Have To Admit
    May 28, 2021 at 3:21 pm

    Ripping off a debt collection agency is in fact legendary

  • randiguy2006
    May 28, 2021 at 3:04 pm

    Too hard to follow.

    All I got out of the is Aidan is a crossdresser.

    • Michael Giannetti
      Mike Giannetti
      May 29, 2021 at 5:30 am

      She’s WAY too old for me but I wouldn’t mind buying some of that jewelry for my ex’s daughter, I mean my girlfriend. My teeth are fuckin killing me kid.

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