All-Star Criminals

Jar Jar Stinks Junkbox Arrested For Robbing, Assaulting 92 Year Old Quincy Woman, Is A Negotiable Backpage Hooker, Customer Reviews Are Not Good

Jar Jar Stinks Junkbox Arrested For Robbing, Assaulting 92 Year Old Quincy Woman, Is A Negotiable Backpage Hooker, Customer Reviews Are Not Good

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So we can see where turtle riders are coming from before they click on our blogs. The vast majority of you are here after clicking on a link that you saw on Facebook, followed by people who Google us, and Twitter users. But the last few days we’ve been getting hundreds of people a day from a forum called “USA Sex Guide Info,” which evidently is a forum where dudes get together and compare and contrast their user experiences with local backpage hookers:

So we clicked on it to see which blog was being shared in there and this is what we found:

Yup, the backpage hooker they’re discussing is none other than Kayla Noel-Brown, the junkbox we exposed who conspired with her junkbox boy toy to rob and assault a 92 year old Quincy woman, who then pretended to be a “good samaritan” after her part in the crime.

She was just arrested the other day and looks as glamorous as you imagined she would:

Good God!! It’s Jar Jar Stinks!!

Shocking that an upstanding citizen like this would be a backpage prostitute.

Never saw that one coming!!

But the reviews simply aren’t very good. Complaints include:

  • She was pregnant
  • She’s crazy
  • She sometimes wasted client’s time by claiming she was married and would only do fetish stuff
  • She wasn’t very good, even though she charged $80
  • She may or may not have had a bag of crack on her gerber servers

“Ready to hunt” might be the perviest statement ever written on the Internet. “Hunting” $80 crack whores is like cops sitting outside the Blarney Stone on St. Patrick’s Day pulling over everyone who stumbles out of there. It’s not hunting if the game you’re hunting has a 100% chance of being taken down.

Others complained that her bedroom was small and dirty, and she was covered in track marks, but that she was “nice” and her prices were negotiable:

So at least she’s got that going for her.

In fairness this guy liked her:

Although I can’t say how much stock I put in a guy who regularly discusses crackhead poon with a bunch of strangers.

Still, there were worse reviews than the ones she got (trigger warning – horny dudes discussing terrible things):

If I ever reach the point where I’m reduced to discussing the shared BBBJ experiences I had with a Quincy crackpuppet, please just shoot me in the head. I don’t wanna live anymore.

She apparently lived at her grandfather’s house where that dirty room in the review was located, and when we first exposed her Grandpa was the first one claiming that she dindu nuffin:

Then when it became undeniable and she was eventually arrested it was suddenly the boyfriend’s fault, and his alone:

She wanted to get clean, they just didn’t have any beds for her:

Yup, it’s never her fault. It’s the “disease.”

Anyway, it’s sad to see people reduced to this, but at the end of the day this is the life she chose. She doesn’t have a disease. She has vices and serious lack of self control. She chose to rob the old lady just like she chose to negotiate her prices with Weymouth’s shadiest skeeveballs.

55 Comment(s)
  • Bill Flambay
    February 25, 2018 at 3:10 pm

    All, she is updating her other FB profile, Kay Brown.

  • Dirty Mike and the Boys
    November 30, 2017 at 11:28 pm

    We miss you Kayla!
    Love,
    Dirty Mike and the Boys

  • Nick O’Keefe
    November 29, 2017 at 9:08 pm

    She a fuckin NASTY ass hoe!!
    She licked my asshole for a bag of speed.
    Was good too. When you need more babe hit me up.

    • Christopher Clayton
      November 30, 2017 at 10:30 pm

      I bet you twerked that ass on Kayla’s face
      I used to be her neighbor and damn that girl was crazy. Lived upstairs from the skank. She used to want to get with me. I said no way love, no way.

  • Troubled Nostrils
    November 28, 2017 at 12:56 pm

    I’d bet her rectum is cleaner than her mouth.

    • They call me Ponch
      November 28, 2017 at 9:31 pm

      Smells like bleach

    • Poo
      November 30, 2017 at 12:28 pm

      I bet by the time she is 35 she will need adult diapers, cause her shit is gonna just start falling out her ass. Lol. Gonna be a stinky bitch.. well even more of one

  • Didn’t want to
    November 28, 2017 at 11:43 am

    Anyone who has ever wanted to get help and get clean, know if you REALLY want to get help from anywhere, any detox, any rehab.. you call them like your trying to get ahold of your door dealer. The reason is to see if you really want help or if your just wasting their time. You can’t call once a day for a week and think your gonna get a bed, and any addict knows that. If you call them once a day they know your doing for someone else, she called in front of you, said they said no beds again grandpa so I tried but no one will help me. And you believed it. If she wanted help she would have called every other hour and that bitch would have had a bed later that night, if not the next day. One call doesn’t do it. How many times you think she would call her dealer in a row when she was looking to get high? Please stop with making excuses. The help is there. For those that want it

    • Didn’t want to
      November 28, 2017 at 11:45 am

      Drug dealer* I apologize for any errors in my previous post spelling wise. I know that so many people will attack you for a spelling error. I didn’t proof read before posting.. my bad

  • Shookones
    November 28, 2017 at 11:13 am

    Should have saved this blog for latter in the morning. Reading this first thing with a cup of coffee. ……Fuckinnngggg YAAAAACCCKKKKK!!!!

  • Bill Clinton
    November 28, 2017 at 10:56 am

    Attractive women would be well served to take a look at these “before” and “after” photos (long term drug use) so they can see what will happen to them should they decide to use drugs. Kayla had a great body that would have kept a man quite happy for many years, but instead she decided to squander away what God gave her for quick highs.

    • Christopher Clayton
      November 28, 2017 at 11:36 am

      She did have a nice ass back in the day, but now it’s riddled with loose fitting jeans on crackhead legs with fresh sperm dripping off her dirty panties and dried sperm crusting off of her ass crack.

  • The Rant Queen
    November 28, 2017 at 9:44 am

    What the fuck is a BBBJ(CIM)???

    And EEEEEEEEEEEW!

    • The Rant Queen
      November 28, 2017 at 9:49 am

      Never mind. EEEEEEEW.

      • Johnny5
        November 28, 2017 at 11:05 am

        CUM IN MOUTH

        lol

    • Name
      November 28, 2017 at 6:32 pm

      Bareback blowjob cum in mouth

  • Finn
    November 28, 2017 at 9:39 am

    bbbj = bare back blow job
    utr = under the radar

    I love you Urban Dictionary!

  • DirtyFamily
    November 28, 2017 at 8:41 am

    You are damn right this aint a disease…..SHE IS THE DISEASE.

    I can tell you right now, I am NO angel. I went from being a full blown heroin addict, doing dirty things for money and losing everything including my own children. But guess what I did? I GOT THE FUCK UP AND WENT AND GOT HELP. Today? I am doing what I should be doing…Living a life free of addiction with my children.

    She on the other hand…is just a dirty no good piece of trash. I am beginning to wonder if she had been exposed months ago…would this have been avoided? Probably not. Cause even though her nasty self has been exposed, grandpa dirty is behind her to clear her name. EXPOSE THEM ALL. By the way…someone show this to grandpa bill. I would love to hear his reaction while all the proof is in his face like the nuts he blows on her face.

    • Gramps
      November 28, 2017 at 10:29 am

      I’m sure her grandpa knows, hell he could be pimping her out himself. Congrats on your sobriety. Keep moving forward and don’t look back!

    • Similar
      November 28, 2017 at 8:48 pm

      I am in the same boat. I also need a friend who understands what I have been through… which is impossible because I don’t want to be taken advantage of. I have killed myself to keep my kids, most people don’t get that. I can’t get along with women who have have had zero disadvantage and are still frustrated with their lives…… if you see this and want to talk let me know, the other day I just posted saying how it isn’t a disease but a choice. How it was all my fault and at the same time its all up to me to fix it. It’s rare to find someone similar.

      • You will find them
        November 28, 2017 at 10:32 pm

        There are plenty of them, it’s all about finding the right people. But just a heads up, don’t trust so easy. If your strong enough to ask for help and really want it. It’s there. But it takes a lot of work

        • You will find them
          November 28, 2017 at 10:37 pm

          Make a new email that you don’t mind putting on her, I would love to talk to you from one recovering addict to another. I have 6 years clean. I get where you are coming from

  • Stuart P
    November 28, 2017 at 8:12 am

    I wonder if she has a selfie with a cock in her mouth in the front seat of some rando’s rusty ’94 Honda Civic hatchback with the hashtag “dorky”? Because whoring yourself out for a few Jacksons is a lot cooler than earning an honest living slinging coffee at DD- it’s what all the hip kids are doing these days!

    • Sasha
      November 28, 2017 at 2:27 pm

      I actually have a streetwalking video believe it or not. Some creep sent it to me after she screwed him over. Guess she went on and on about how awful I was lol

      • Fred Sampson
        November 28, 2017 at 3:31 pm

        Look, so you were one too!!!

      • Johnsonville Bratwurst
        November 28, 2017 at 8:27 pm

        Do you have friends who date hookers??? How do you know this guy?? For someone trying to win a custody battle, you sure have a lot of shady friends, him, Kristina Anzalone, etc..

  • Always Learning
    November 28, 2017 at 8:10 am

    There’s actually a website to discuss and rate prostitutes?

    • Stunt Penis
      November 28, 2017 at 11:09 am

      I hear Clyde from New Bedford runs it.

  • Turd reversalist
    November 28, 2017 at 7:46 am

    Wait, what?
    She does bum stuff?
    I’m starting to feel that tingly, charitable sensation.
    Maybe I should help her out with the defense fund.

  • Some Guy
    November 28, 2017 at 7:03 am

    Another prostitute who looks nasty (and really is). God damn guys, if you’re going to shell out cash for some pussy, at least have a little class to get one that doesn’t come with a disclaimer to wash your cock with Purex when finished.

    • The Rant Queen
      November 28, 2017 at 9:46 am

      RIGHT?? I can’t help but yell at the monitor when they say “I felt disgusted after”. Like “UH, NO SHIT!”

    • Stinky Dinky
      November 28, 2017 at 12:10 pm

      Purex! Lol that would hurt. I think you meant Purrell.

  • Christina Golden
    November 28, 2017 at 4:16 am

    I used to be best friends with this girl when I was younger. It’s really sad to see that it came to this. She was always a bit crazy and out of control in high school. People have tried to help this girl but she almost insisted on going down the wrong path. How sad, really. I hope she gets the help she needs, i really do. Shame on Kayla and that other guy for robbing that old defenseless lady. Kayla imagine if that was your grandma, seriously. She never grew up, she is an adult stuck in her rebellious teen years, which is obvious. I know she has had chances to straighten up and pull her life together with the help of some of her normal ex’s like Nick. But as he was supporting her when she was pregnant with his kid, she was off in cars with random guys taking pills and smoking weed. It’s almost like she asked for this life and wasn’t dealt the bad cards.

    • Sasha
      November 28, 2017 at 2:01 pm

      What are you talking about? Who the f is nick? She has no idea who the little babies father is. I attended her divorce when it was discussed openly.

      • Fred Sampson
        November 28, 2017 at 3:28 pm

        Sasha, why do you keep going on and on??? What about your page? Just remember, no matter what, Marky Mark had a baby with Kayla first, and why won’t he marry you???

        • Christina Golden
          November 28, 2017 at 6:46 pm

          She dated Nick before Mark and cheated Nick so so often. I would often be with her when she would hook up with some guy in some store or in a garage somewhere and then 15 minutes later meet Nick and kiss him with the mouth she just sucked someone off with. She was really gross. I was friends with her for many years through high school but after school ended she really took a turn for the worse.

          • Proctor and maybe Gamble
            November 28, 2017 at 7:02 pm

            Wow, huge chip on your shoulder, Christina. No need to post what you just did. Isn’t your own mom a little, “iffy”, shall we say?

          • Yuck
            November 30, 2017 at 11:54 am

            Lmao mom is more then a little iffy…

      • Christina Golden
        November 28, 2017 at 6:41 pm

        She dated Nick for a few years back when she was like 17-20. She was pregnant with his kid (which died inside her due to drugs and drinking). What a shame, really. She chose this life. Nick was a nice guy.

        • Sasha
          November 28, 2017 at 7:13 pm

          Ohhhh I get it. Was she really ever pregnant? I felt like that story was a lie when kayla told it. I keep reading and learning cuz it’s all evidentiary support in court—- silly. Why wouldn’t I? I’ve been saying this shit and no one would listen. And who says I “want” to be married? Lol.

          • Christina Golden
            November 28, 2017 at 7:54 pm

            Yes of course she was pregnant. She was a few months along when the child died. Really sad. I was in a car with her when she was asking her friend for “only half a pill” when her child had perished inside her. Smoking weed as well. I feel sorry for her, I really do.

          • Johnsonville Bratwurst
            November 29, 2017 at 5:21 pm

            Phhtt, immaterial, she betrayed her. When’s Marky Mark going to cut his comeback album?? Maybe he can pose with his shitbox Mercedes!!!

        • Johnsonville Bratwurst
          November 28, 2017 at 8:25 pm

          You feel bad? You just totally betrayed her.

          • Sasha
            November 29, 2017 at 1:10 pm

            Christina was forced to tell the truth about this girl because she’s been associated with her in the past. If she didn’t- people would think she was down with people robbing 92 year old women. Buzz off. Christina as very respectful and simply stated facts. What she just said was far from one of the worst things anyone’s heard about kayla.

          • Christina Golden
            November 29, 2017 at 5:39 pm

            Thank you Sasha. Yes, I felt obligated to let the public know. As a former friend of hers I genuinely feel bad that she has gone down this path. It’s just too crazy for me. More than 100 people have came to me asking what my take on things were. Well, now they know.
            And “Bratwurst”, if that is your real name, which it isn’t, you are ENABLING her! It’s people like you who enabled her down this path. She needs to fess up to her actions! The truth never fears investigation.

        • Johnsonville Bratwurst
          November 29, 2017 at 8:16 pm

          BS, you felt the need to kick her when she is already rock bottom. I’m not defending her, I think she should do hard time, but telling nasty sex stories from ten years ago makes no sense. Not very professional, hope your high end employer doesn’t see it.

          • Johnsonville Bratwurst
            November 29, 2017 at 8:20 pm

            Ohh, and, Sasha? It’s 92 year old WOMAN, not women, get your grammar right, I thought you were now Stephen Hawking with your half a semester in special needs science at QJC???

          • Christina Golden
            November 29, 2017 at 9:04 pm

            Looks like you’re getting pretty offended here. Defending a heroin addict who almost murdered a 92 year old lady isn’t professional of you!
            Stop enabling heroin adicts, you complete moron you.

          • WhereThePervsAt
            November 29, 2017 at 10:01 pm

            So this is either grandpa Bill….OR that creepy perv Michael. The sex stories being told are from the past 10 years. See, the difference between Kayla & Sasha is this…Sasha has the balls to tell her OWN truths while Kayla lives a life full of dicks, drugs and diseases. Sasha also wouldn’t attack a 92 year old woman for a quick high.

          • Sasha
            November 30, 2017 at 8:04 pm

            Bratwurst dude- who are you? Why do you feel the need to talk so much shit behind a fake name? Lol. It’s funny. Also, biotechnology has nothing to do with special needs. Its biochemistry and making medication—- why don’t you learn a little about life before you go saying nonsense and correcting other people’s typos and calling it grammar mistakes. Fool.

            I’m NOT perfect, yet I’ve always retained a certain level of self-respect so that I can be completely honest about my past and not feel ashamed. I think that’s why people like me <3

          • Christina Golden
            November 30, 2017 at 10:13 pm

            The time line of these “sex stories” in regards to Kayla is irrelevant. Let me please guide your attention to the date of this article, you mentally challenged individual you. If anything, the time like can only show and prove Kayla’s BAD influence on society for the last 10 years. So bratwurst, continue defending heroin addicts who prey on old senior citizens of our community, you complete moron you.
            Sasha clearly holds herself well and with respect, unlike yourself who makes pig nosed statements with no base.

          • Nick O’Keefe
            November 30, 2017 at 10:35 pm

            Yo that girl such a skank. For real. She tied my hands up with a wire coat hanger and put honey down my pants to give me a Taiwana beehive wash. She would do anything for the right price, right Kayla? Peace out.

    • Dirty Mike and the Boys
      November 30, 2017 at 11:31 pm

      We have Kayla Brown on porn tryouts with two BBC men. Reply back for purchase details and rights.

      • Me
        December 8, 2017 at 11:24 am

        Is this real life?

        • Dirty Mike and the Boys
          December 8, 2017 at 3:37 pm

          Yes it is! DVDs are available as well as purchase rights.
          Thank you
          Dirty Mike and The Boys

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