Hoodrat Heroes

New Bedford Xanny Goblin Whines To Desk Girl Because Turtleboy Is Causing Her Mental Problems, But After Seeing Pictures Of Her Passed Out On Heroin, We’re Guessing It’s Not Really Our Fault

Hot mess express – coming through!

Want to advertise with Turtleboy? Email us at Turtleboysports@gmail.com for more information, and check out our website about types of advertising we offer.







I know I’m a bit late this with one but I hope you’ll forgive me. The MOTSS blogs sucked up most of my last week and this one got thrown on the back burner. Well, until now…

Personally, I think Jennifer Dedeus, the New Bedford Xanny Goblin, might have a pretty good running for next year’s queen ratchet. This girl just finds trouble and people to exploit. It’s like she’s got this perpetual desire to cause destruction wherever she goes.

As far as I can tell, I nailed her character to the T. She’s an evil, drama starting, junkie who uses fear tactics and ghetto revenge to get through the day. She will go above and beyond to blame mental illness as her reason for doing it. She’s constantly using the “going to kill herself” thing as a cry for attention.

Please, tell me how being a crazy junkie  is just a disease. Anyone who uses suicide as a manipulative tool is the worst kind of person.

That “disease” is probably why she keeps popping kids out that she can’t  keep custody of. Well, that, and it’s widely known that junkies can’t figure out how to use birth control or wrap their winkies up with a wang sheath.



And he had the proof to back it up. Here is Jennifer sloppily nodding off from heroin. It’s cool though! She’s on the clinic now. -eye roll- Sweet track marks.

He also said that, in his time being her friend, she also bragged about stealing $5k from her sick granny’s checking to get a tit job. However, those aren’t the only thing that’s fake, the commonwealth paid for her dentures.



I’m told, that even though I’m the queen of breaking down ratchet tales, this one was too much for even me to clean up and explain. Read it HERE or just let me give you the Cliff Notes:

  • Jennifer is dating Bobby. Samantha was dating Robert prior to passing away from an OD. Stewart seems to be Samantha’s side piece and muscle. 
  •  Jennifer messaged us looking for revenge after Samantha asked her for pills and Bobby got mad. This started a war between all of them. 
  • Bobby threatened Samantha’s job as a DCF worker by ratting her out. 
  • Samantha challenged Jennifer and Bobby to settle it face to face. Samantha and Stewy went and found the Bobby and Jennifer. Samantha allegedly pulled a gun. Bobby pulled a baton. 
  • Both Bobby and Samantha got arrested for the incident. 
  • Jennifer, mad that Bobby got arrested, messages us and tries to blow up Samantha. 
  • Jennifer alleged that Samantha was dealing drugs on her lunch break, that she was a pill head herself, that she was responsible for Jen’s friend Robert Od’ing. 
  • Jennifer only sent us one page of the police report.
  • The whole thing reeked of bullshit and was overly one-sided.
  • I decided to ignore it. Jennifer got cunty with me. 
  • Jennifer ends up back on my radar for a GFM she started for $2k so she can get tattoos to cover her self-harm scars.
  • She says the self-harm scars are because she was attacked and sexually assaulted.
  • Jennifer, shortly after, gets in to an altercation with the boyfriend of her downstairs neighbor. The neighbor’s man pops her in the face for being a loudmouth. 
  • Jennifer takes to all the community pages to say the cops were “Rasist.”
  • I lurk Jennifer’s page and find out that she said she is constantly in fights and the subject of countless harassment orders. She also had her leg broken in one such fight. 
  • Her whole page is one big “poor me” mountain of drama and ratchetness. 
  • Jennifer gets her own blog because SSTG doesn’t like being used or played by a hood bunny. 

Basically, what it boils down to, is that Xanny Goblin caught wind of Turtleboy as we spread through New Bedford, and tried to use us as one of her revenge tactics.

I found out after the blog hit Jennifer had  been using Samantha’s job at DCF as her main weapon against those who crossed her. “Don’t fuck with me or I’ll get your kids taken away,” kind of stuff. I have no idea if Samantha knew she was doing that  but we had multiple complaints come in that it was Jennifer’s favorite threat.

When the whole brouhaha went down, with Samantha pulling a gun on Jennifer, I knew we were missing a good chunk of the story. I could just feel it in my core.

While everyone featured in the blog was a hoodrat and deserving of being featured – Stewart Hunt was pissed off he got featured for good reason. While I usually laugh at the “free my Boi crowd,” Stew, who came to defense of Samantha, provided the entire other side of the story for us in the comments of our Facebook page. Well, after he threatened to sue of of course.


How interesting it is that Jennifer, when faced with not getting her way and her boyfriend being escorted away in cuffs, threatened to throw herself over an overpass or in front of a car.
She pulled the same thing with poor Desk Girl the day after her blog hit. She tried the same wolf in sheep’s clothing with poor Abi.

While this was going down Deskie was also talking to NSTB about how she hadn’t heard from Jennifer yet. Whoops. Abi thought that would be the end of it, but Jennifer kept going.


The only person Abi is going to push over the edge is me because she’s always dumping in the office crapper. I think we should just set up her computer in the stall.

Yeah, kidnapping. Sure.


Haunting you? Is that why you spend your days trying to ruin people’s lives? That sure would explain a lot.

I love it when Abi tells people we have a removal department. It’s my favorite thing. She’s created this elaborate land filled with SJWs who can overrule the turtle.


Hahahaha she said Xanax Goblin.

The “harassing”‘messages she was getting are LOL-worthy. It was just a bunch of her hoodrat pals telling her about the blog. Well, that and Stewy saying he was going to sue her for snitching.


Abi won’t tell you this, but she loves it when the people come out and fight for themselves. She secretly cheers them on.
It also seems that Jennifer was blowing off her therapy appointment which she clearly is in need of.

Nobody but me gets to make Deskie cry. Nobody.

So, Deskie sent the form over, and after Jennifer’s pretend attorney reviewed it, she filled it out.

Ah yes, the inevitable harassment order! Oh, and the blog is what’s causing her mental health issues.

Oh, and her spin on the fact she doesn’t have her kids is just stunning.

Alright, let me tell you something. No blog is ever going to “cause” someone to hurt themselves. If you hurt yourself over something you’ve done that means you should have been institutionalized long ago. This girl uses self-harm threats as a way to get her way. There is nothing worse in my opinion. It takes away from the people who are really suffering. If you don’t like being publicly outted for being a scumbag then try not being a scumbag. Easy as that.

Then, Turtleboss, who apparently had been watching Deskie handle this skank, decided to chime in.

Jennifer didn’t have an answer for that because she a hoodrat hypocrite.

She even announced to the entire city of New Beige that she was calling the cops on al of them for laughing at her:

Ahhhh, New Bedford. The shithole that never will get old. But perhaps maybe people will learn a lesson from Jennifer: lay off the smack and don’t poke the turtle.

6 Comment(s)
  • Sterling Turtle Rider
    May 5, 2017 at 1:25 am

    Three words – Borderline Personality Disorder. She only knows how to use people and manipulate them, and the threats of suicide are quite common. There is no ‘cure’ for this, only treatment, and that involves her realizing and changing her manipulative behaviors – very rare.

  • Mystressovmayhem
    May 4, 2017 at 1:55 pm

    If she was going to off herself she’d have done it already. Anyone serious about it doesn’t let people know first! They want it to work! They’re friends don’t know until they’re found face down in a tub, hanging from a rafter or floating in the Quabin reservoir! Whole group is certifiable!
    On the bright side, if she did we’d save money on the methodone we’re most likely paying for!

  • Chip Striker
    May 3, 2017 at 11:35 pm

    Ban Narcan.

    I’m serious. Want to know how to stop the opiod epedemic? Ban Narcan. Telling you how dangerous drugs like heroin were since you were a little kid didnt prevent you from being retarded enough to try it. I think a little higher rate of death could be the only answer. All we’re doing with Narcan is minimizing the danger of it.

  • Maggie the Cat
    May 3, 2017 at 5:45 pm

    People who say they’re going to kill themselves should be encouraged to do so. If their lives are so miserable and show no possibility of improvement, why should society insist that they stay alive? That’s cruel.

    • True story
      May 3, 2017 at 6:14 pm

      That’s not cool to say I’m a suicide survivor, and had to go through a lot to get better. It takes hard work to get through it, which yes I did but took a long time. I had a post about me a long time ago and the writer sent me a message saying I should kill myself not cool. Still thinking about reporting him just for that. But overall you should keep in mind there are people out there that are truly suicide is this girl taking it to the extreme sure. But seriously have a little compassion….

Comment on this Post


All-Star Worcester Parents Lay Siege To School Bus, Beat Up Bus Driver, Then Write Magnificent Things On Facebook
Comments From The Worcester Parent Bus Riot Blog Were Borderline Orgasmic
Hot Girl Threatening To Sue Turtleboy Sports Over Busgate, City Council Still Hasn’t Even Mentioned It