• This Turtlemobile Tearing Shit Up At Seekonk Speedway Is The Greatest Thing We’ve Ever Seen



    This Turtlemobile Tearing Shit Up At Seekonk Speedway Is The Greatest Thing We’ve Ever Seen

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    The Turtlemobile made its debut at the Seekonk Motor Speedway this weekend. Check out this bad mamma jamma…..

    That is the greatest thing we’ve ever seen. The car was driven and designed by local driving legend Kenny Kline:

    And he took a close second to some shithead in an Elizabeth Warren-mobile:

    Dude got him dirty on the second to last lap, right after Kenny pulled off the improbably turtle pass on the inside turn, and it was a wrap after that.

    According to everyone who was down there the car was a huge hit. Everyone there rides the turtle. Everyone. Cops, racers, fans, children, hot Moms. You start rocking the turtle in public like this then prepare yourself for high fives. The people who complain about Turtleboy make up less than 1% of the population, and no one likes them anyway. Meanwhile the vast silent majority read it every day and are down with the Revolution 1,000%.

    Oh, and good news – according to commentary on Turtleboy Live last night this was not the last time we’re gonna see this, and the Turtlemobile will get its revenge….

    Giving the phrase “ride the turtle” completely new meaning.

     

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    Discussion

    1. TIG OLE BITTIES


      Kenny could rob a gas station with his baby in a backpack dressed in all Chicago Bulls gear while on Facebook live and screaming “Fuck the police”. Then in front of the judge on Friday morning the only thing he says is ” who got the stamps”, and TurtleBoy will still not make a blog about him. He has a FREE PASS foe life.

    2. They call me Ponch


      When will the TBS decals be available?

    3. Simmons Walters


      That was a 2002-2005 vintage Nissan Maxima, a fun and fast little 255-HP sedan which as a lot of power for that time. I had one of those and I miss it!

    4. WorcesterProper


      That wasn’t Kenny, that was one of the Gaffneys driving that shitbox. ‘Cuz the Gaffneys now have a new gig on their plate. Now they’re gonna go round and round and round and round and round and round and round
      Yeah, just like before.
      They’ll quit this gig too.

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