All-Star Criminals

Voke-Stached Athol Man Robbed Another Bank In NH After Robbing Gardner Bank And Still Hasn’t Changed His Clothes

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Last week we shared this story with you about some Voke-stache clad nudnik from Athol who robbed a bank in Gardner without ANY attempt whatsoever to disguise himself.

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Since his grimyness made him stand out like a sore thumb, he was immediately identified by the masses on the Facebook machine:

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Of course this guy’s name is Vinny. Well somehow this genius alluded capture and actually robbed ANOTHER bank on Friday in Rindge, NH:

Police have identified the man they say robbed a TD Bank branch on Route 202 Friday afternoon. Vincent M. Torraco, 25, whose last known address was in Athol, Mass., is also believed to be responsible for two other TD Bank robberies in New England, according to a Monday afternoon news release from the Rindge Police Department. Warrants have been issued for Torraco’s arrest in connection with those robberies, police said.

Rindge Police Chief Todd A. Muilenberg said Monday morning he has reason to believe the Rindge robbery is related to bank robberies in Gardner, Mass., and in Connecticut because of surveillance videos. Torraco is described by police as a white male who’s 5 feet, 10 inches tall. He has brown hair and blue eyes, according to the news release. He may be driving a dark green, 2001 Honda Accord coupe with a Massachusetts license plate of 6KVY50, the news release said. Police ask anyone with information about Torraco’s whereabouts to call the Rindge Police Department at 899-5009.

In addition, police ask anyone who sees Torraco or his vehicle to call 911 immediately. On Friday, a white male suspect, now identified as Torraco, entered the Rindge bank at about 2:30 p.m. and presented a teller with a note demanding money, Muilenberg said Friday. The teller complied, giving the suspect an undisclosed amount of money from the cash drawer, and the man left without incident, Muilenberg said. He said no weapons were seen, no threats of violence were made, and no injuries were reported.

How is that possible? How can everyone and their mother know you robbed a bank and you’re still robbing banks 30 minutes from home? Here’s the best part – he still hasn’t changed his clothes:

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That’s right, this dumbass is still rocking the Zoo York hoodie. I can smell the stale cigarettes and stench of nudnikery in Worcester. This guy might be the worst bank robber of all time. The fact that he’s alluded authorities for this long is nothing less than a modern day miracle.

Like we said before, if you don’t brandish a gun at a bank then the teller shouldn’t give you money. I know it’s policy and all, but the lazyness of these “bank robbers” these days offends me. If you’re gonna rob a bank then you should at least have to wear a mask, walk inside, and tell everyone to hit the floor. That’s how banks were robbed back in my day. This guy is just one step up from a panhandler. He gives someone with money a handwritten sign and they give him money for drugs. Imagine what this idiot would do if the bank teller was like, “Nah.” Or if he or she started laughing at him and yelled, “this inbred mother fucker thinks he’s robbing us!!” It would be humiliating and he’d never rob a bank again.

Update: He’s been caught:

But will he be allowed to wear the Zoo York hoodie in jail?

 

 

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5 Comment(s)
  • Lighty Light
    September 28, 2016 at 8:00 am

    alluded police? LOL
    I think you meant to say eluded.

    • peanut
      September 29, 2016 at 12:43 am

      I was going to say that. Alluded [to] was used twice in place of eluded.

      And speaking of laziness (not lazyness)…

  • Reddog
    September 27, 2016 at 10:18 pm

    Guy needs a punch in the face for just being plain stupid.

  • Jehovah Comeovah
    September 27, 2016 at 6:02 pm

    He has robbed 3 banks, one gas station. All without a fucking mask. Lololol

  • juror seven esq.
    September 27, 2016 at 4:18 pm

    Arrested in North Carolina, what bathroom was he using?

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