Chucklefucker Hippies Protesting For Panhandling Rights In Cranston Are Too Dumb To Realize That They Use The Money For Heroin
Want to advertise with Turtleboy? Email us at [email protected] for more information, and check out our website about types of advertising we offer.
So a bunch of hippies are protesting a Cranston, RI city ordinance that bans panhandling:
And a bunch of them were ticketed for standing in the road.
All you really need to do is listen to these idiots to understand just how out of touch they really are:
“I don’t think that any ordinance that criminalizes any behavior that individuals have to engage in to survive with such a broken safety net is every going be functional. If we’re looking at what is dangerous, homelessness is dangerous. Not standing in a median and trying to survive.”
Alright, first of all, the safety net ain’t broken. It’s stronger than it’s ever been. But the problem is too many people use the safety net over and over again, instead of using it to ensure that they no longer need the safety net.
Secondly, how dumb do you have to be to believe that they’re not panhandling for heroin money? How do you think they ended up this way? Do you understand how hard it is to end up panhandling and NOT have an addiction to heroin? They’re not “trying to survive.” They’re trying to get enough money for their next fix. All these people are doing is fighting for the right of panhandlers to slowly kill themselves. They’re basically advocating for eugenics.
But see these morons?
None of them know the first thing about the people they’re protesting on behalf of. They’re all suburban, granola eating losers, who are so far removed from the realities of urban life that they think they’re helping. They’re not.
Look, we’ve seen this show before in Worcester. Years ago our City Council passed a common sense resolution banning panhandling. Because panhandlers are like vermin. There’s never just one of them, and they smell like shit. More than anything, they’re dangerous. You can’t have people walking in and out of traffic, coming up and knocking on your windows and giving you dirty looks when you don’t give them the money they think they’re entitled to.
It’s also just a really bad look for the city when someone thinking about buying a home or opening up a business in Worcester gets off at the Kelley Square exit and the first thing they’re greeted by is this:
But luckily for people outside of Worcester they don’t have this twatwaffle living amongst them:
This Stepford Wives looking creature is called a “Tracy Novick.” It tends to live in the only house in the city that is exempt from paying property taxes because it’s on conservation land. It has nothing better to do than tweet five million times a day in order to validate its self importance. And it will sue the city on behalf of panhandlers and win in federal court, arguing that these crackheads are exercising free speech. But beware – she uses hashtags to spread throughout the region, and she has nothing but time on her hands. She can infect your city, and if she takes them to court then she will probably win there again.
But, Cranston’s lawyers could get around this by arguing the fact that panhandling is a business. They make lots of money. They pay no taxes on it. And they have no permits to operate a business. They collect money from people but do not provide anything in exchange. If they were to give you hot dogs or milkshakes in exchange for cash, they’d be shut down. So why can you collect money for doing NOTHING, but not collect money in exchange for goods and services? This is the argument a good lawyer would make to defend these common sense laws.
Anyway, the real problem is the morons who give money to these idiots and pat themselves on the back for making a difference. All they’re doing is keeping the drug trade going. These people are assholes, but they wouldn’t be out there if ding-dongs stopped giving them money. So if you ever see someone holding up traffic by giving money to these addicts, feel free to take a picture and send it to Turtleboy for public shaming. It’s the only way to defeat this plague.
We urge you to support the Turtleboy Sponsors by doing business with them. Without them none of this is possible. Click on any of them to check out their sites or Facebook pages.