Who remembers this saltwater sea cow?
Her name is Katherine Lanagan, AKA Katherine Jeffs, but better known to turtle riders as the Natick Dumpsterslug. Her ratchet resume includes selling food stamps on Facebook for drug money because DCF done stole her crotch fruits, messaging turtle riders with racial slurs for calling her out on her bullshit, unironically calling out other ratchets for not maintaining employment, and spending taxpayer money to get her meat wallet pierced.
She’s one of less than a handful of ratchets to appear in more than one Ratchet Madness tournament, and she’s back for more today with some TERRIBLE news.
She’s evidently dumped this winner:
Which is a Goddamn tragedy because he was really stable and seemed like he was about to turning his life around and open up his own barbershop any day now.
But now she’s getting taken to tuna town by the new chudstuffer.
Imagine your cervix scraper was so dry, and so desperately in need of lubrication that you were willing to go spelunking inside the Natick Dumpsterslug? Ouch.
He seems really stable too. Never gets in trouble with the law or anything like that.
Ever. I’m sure he’ll be a great Dad, and all of their family photos will NOT be taken in the DCF visitor’s room.
Sure, she could try to get her shit together and get her poon polyps back from the state, or she could just take the pipe from Rawdog Rambo and fire another ward of the state out of her baby cannon. Whatever she thinks is best.
I’m not kidding either – if this isn’t the perfect case for mandatory sterilization then I don’t know what is. I don’t want the government to overuse it, I just want it to be for extreme cases like this. If you have more than 1 crotch fruit in DCF care then you have to get neutered by Uncle Sam because you clearly cannot be trusted due to your revulsion for latex and personal responsibility.
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