All-Star Criminals

Turns Out The Woman Who Tried Kidnapping 3 Year Old Kid On School Bus Was Really Just High, Didn’t Realize It Wasn’t Her Kid And Didn’t Want DCF To Know

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Yesterday we shared this story with you about the Turtle riding mother who was shocked to discover that some local vagrant had attempted to get her three year old son off of his school bus, only to be denied by the responsible and alert bus monitor. Well we’ve got a little twist in the story for this Turtleboy exclusive.

When the child was originally taken off of the bus, his mother, Emily Petit, asked her neighbors if they had seen anything. They all said no. However, another one of her neighbors is in recovery from addiction and apparently had a relapse. She is in the process of getting her kid back, but she’s still getting high. Naturally.

Anyway, this woman got all jammed up and when she saw the school bus pull up, she thought it was her kid’s school bus. So she got on the bus, but when they started asking her questions she got all paranoid and nervous and ran through the parking lot because she didn’t want them to call DCF.


We know this because we spoke with Emily Petit and she has confirmed this story. According to her the woman came forward this morning because she saw it on the news and wanted to come clean with the truth. Unfortunately before doing this she lied to both the family and the police and got everyone worried about their kids getting kidnapped.

Honestly, when we first heard this story we figured it had to be some other explanation. I mean, this was like the script out of a bad Lifetime movie. And trust me, I’ve seen a million Lifetime movies, and some of them are pretty good. But I can’t tell you how many times some psychopath who can’t conceive snatches up someone else’s kid. It’s the plot line of like 35-40% of all Lifetime movies.

Anyway, this story makes so much more sense, and it’s not the least bit surprising. This is Worcester. We got a bunch of crackhead parents in this city who have no business raising kids since they can’t keep their own lives in order. But they just keep on reproducing because they know the state will just keep on throwing assistance at them, so why bother altering their lifestyles? If she wants easy cash she can just go down to the corner and hold a sign all day. If anyone has a problem with that then a wealthy woman from the West Side who pays no property taxes will sue the city on her behalf.

So yea, we just wanted to let the public know about this because it will probably help some people rest easier knowing there isn’t some nutjob woman out there trying to snatch up your kids like a bad Lifetime movie. Don’t get me wrong, it’s still AWFUL that parents like this are out there, and her poor kids are the ones who are going to suffer as a result of this. Oh yea, and if these kids ever get hurt because their Mom is passed out after her latest bender then everyone’s gonna blame DCF. But these people are sneaky and manipulative, so I don’t know what you expect DCF to do.



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17 Comment(s)
  • Realist
    March 31, 2016 at 8:33 pm

    Is it still Petty’s fault?

  • Publius
    March 31, 2016 at 5:23 pm

    The rich woman pays not taxes because it appears the property is owned by the husbands employer a nonprofit. You can confirm on Treasurer’s website. No taxes paid but said wealthy woman would gladly raise yours.

  • RSoxGuy
    March 31, 2016 at 3:57 pm

    “This is a safe city (unless you are a 2nd grader than you better hide your ass under the school bus seats because the junkies are coming for you)” – Joe Petty

    • Cessar Augustus
      March 31, 2016 at 5:17 pm

      This us NOT a safe city. The administration is lying to us.

      • Cessar Augustus
        March 31, 2016 at 5:18 pm


  • Reddog
    March 31, 2016 at 3:14 pm

    I’d love to know the address of said person,we all know who she is except Jan G, so I could check it out for myself,see what’s so special that makes it exempt. Also would make a great location for my new pan handling operation I’ve started to think about now that the weather is getting warmer. My property taxes went up again this year and I need some extra dough to pay them.

  • Jan g
    March 31, 2016 at 12:14 pm

    Who doesn’t pay property taxes on the West Side ??????? I am sure your folks do too.

    • Ted
      March 31, 2016 at 5:13 pm

      T. O. N. No taxes.

  • Hates pabhandlers
    March 31, 2016 at 11:37 am

    They really should ban soliciting money without a permit

  • John Wick 3 : The horrible 3rd sequel
    March 31, 2016 at 11:28 am

    Guys watch Lifetime for the same reason we watch any channel we normally wouldn’t. Bewbs.

    • Mediocrity
      March 31, 2016 at 12:32 pm


    • FiestyLawyerLady
      March 31, 2016 at 1:19 pm

      My thoughts exactly!

  • John Wick 2: More dead puppy revenge.
    March 31, 2016 at 11:08 am

    That’s some bullshit. I saw Silence of the Lambs and Taken on there twice crusing through the guide. If watching Taken makes me a beta bitch, I’ll be a beta bitch with a very particular set of skills.

    Also, the Saved by the Bell movie.

    • John Wick
      March 31, 2016 at 7:25 pm

      But those aren’t “lifetime” movies. I’m talking the “made for lifetime channel” movies… You know, the stuff about some mom with a bum leg or something. Gets a good job and can afford a plane ticket and then reunites with her long lost son far away, and then the movie ends as they eat spaghetti.

      • FiestyLawyerLady
        March 31, 2016 at 8:09 pm

        You forgot the happy music before it cuts the credits.

  • John Wick
    March 31, 2016 at 10:51 am

    “I’ve seen a million lifetime movies.”

    So, turtleboy is actually… Turtlegirl?!?

    Men don’t watch lifetime movies. Just clarifying for any SJW types that are reading.

    • Doc
      March 31, 2016 at 4:53 pm

      Eh, I’ve watched a couple just to support some locals that worked on ’em or had their songs on the soundtracks.

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