All-Star Criminals

Westerly Wank Wizard Nearly Makes $5,500 With GoFundMe After Crashing Car While High With Poon Polyp In Backseat Despite Extensive Criminal Record

 

This is Christina Paliotti from Westerly, RI.

As you can see from the duckface selfies booty shots, she won’t make you wear a rubber. As a matter of fact she reproduced a couple years ago, despite having one of the longest criminal rap sheets I’ve ever seen for a girl who hasn’t hit 30 yet. She’s been arrested in the following towns:

  • Narragansett
  • Richmond (4 times)
  • Charlestown
  • Pawtucket
  • Coventry
  • Cranston

For the following crimes:

  • Shoplifting (lots of these)
  • Conspiracy
  • Drug possession
  • Domestic violence
  • Disorderly conduct
  • Receiving stolen goods
  • Driving with a suspended license
  • Simple assault
  • Resisting arrest

 

If you get caught shoplifting more than once you’re not a thief, you’re a junkie. Thieves don’t get caught that many times, but junkies do. They steal to feed their habits because it’s hard to keep a job if you’re nodding off into your fruit loops every morning.

All those arrests don’t even count the 12 warrants and the eviction under her belt as well.

Luckily for her she comes from a family with the resources to bail her out and never force her to go to rehab. Her daughter was born addicted because she got high while she was pregnant, and her daughter was born with withdrawals and needed 6 weeks in the hospital, but she plays the loving Mom on Facebook so everything must be all good.

On April 19, 2021 the Westerly Wank Wizard was arrested yet again in Charletown for driving around high as a kite with her daughter in the car and crashing.

Within hours her sister Sarah and mother started and shared a GoFundMe in her honor, that has now raised over $5,500, probably because they didn’t mention the circumstances that led to the crash.

Look at the car. It’s nothing short of a miracle that the baby survived. In a sane world she would lose the kid immediately, but this isn’t a sane world – this is Rhode Island. Two weeks later the Wank Wizard and her Mom Lori were at a baby shower like none of this happened.

 

So what are they raising money for? Insurance covers the crash, she didn’t have a job so she isn’t losing any income, and she clearly has no hospitalization bills since she’s walking around like this never happened. I think the one idiot who donated $500 to her should probably be made aware that her generous donation is gonna go directly into Diego the friend neighborhood fentanyl dealer’s college fund for his kids.

 

 

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62 Comment(s)
  • You know
    May 24, 2021 at 7:08 pm

    Christina use to be my gf years ago before the drugs, honestly she was great nice took care of me really came off as a home wife I think people just get lost not that any of this is right but hell idk people go through things and what not if I had it my way and drugs didn’t take over she’d probably be the mother to my kids shit sucks even will all the slut stuff I still miss her she crashed her car into a tree when we Broke up and told everyone that’s way lol she’s crazy but shit crazy to do that means she’s crazy enough to have your back but like I said that was before the drugs she always hated her eye that had a blemish called it the poop eye…. yeah go ahead make joke but it was just one more thing that made her who she was at the time beautiful to me

  • Tiffany
    May 24, 2021 at 2:01 pm

    There was a video of her going around where She got gang banged by 6 or 7 black men in providence It was brutal They had her crawling around and barking like a dog And licking cum off of the floor saying please more woof woof I think they actually made her boyfriend at the time come pick her up but naked I think they actually made her boyfriend at the time come pick her up In the video they at her crawl out side on a leash dude didn’t even say anything

  • No
    May 21, 2021 at 5:08 am

    Death would be a better outcome for that kid than growing up with her. All Rhode Island girls are fucking trash ghetto pieces of shit.

  • New boot goofin'
    May 20, 2021 at 9:34 am

    SO you crash your car with your kid, get arrested for DUI, child endangerment and drugs…….get $5000 from a go fund me. Too bad they cant arrest her or her family for obtaining money fraudulently.

  • Captain Trips
    Captain Trips
    May 19, 2021 at 8:31 am

    I’m beginning to think that there are many more fucked up women than men.

    • Judge Dread
      May 19, 2021 at 9:53 am

      I’m beginning to think you aren’t going to call me back after our one night stand.

  • cumbus
    May 19, 2021 at 8:18 am

    I went to high school with her we called her row boat because she used to go down the aisle of the school bus jerking off or fingering the kids on both sides and it looked like she was rowing a boat or making a porno or driving a golf cart while jerking everyone off or fingering the other girls lol. The busses all smelled like cum and pussy. Anyone know her onlyfans account?

  • B_G Jui_y D_cks
    May 19, 2021 at 8:05 am

    Judge Dread:

    “I’d like to solve the puzzle. Is it Big Juicy Dicks?”

  • Brown Eye
    May 19, 2021 at 7:01 am

    Two words, Smoke Show. I love that ass pic and would hit her in the hamper all day long. Take that to the bank.

    • MGTOW TURTLE
      May 19, 2021 at 8:40 am

      You desprit dog you Dude her ass looks like some welfare flapjacks that were made in a crack hovel
      Its wide and flat there is nothing nice about that at all it probably has warts and a rash all over it too
      That skank will definitely give you cauliflower cock if that’s the sort of thing you’re into

      • Bro check out my chick bro
        May 20, 2021 at 7:21 pm

        Guaranteed this chick is hotter than anything you’ve ever smashed. And she’s a fucking mess. You’re one of those dudes who thinks the broads he gets are 10s and brags but when you finally meet them, they’re 5s at best. Probably begin and end every sentence with “bro” too. There’s a million dudes just like you….a total douch and you don’t even know it. Fucking sad. Oh well I get a kick out of morons like you and when I think I’m having a bad day I just think of you and my life doesn’t seem so bad anymore. Good luck with life “bro”

  • Michael Giannetti
    Mike Giannetti
    May 19, 2021 at 3:44 am

    She’s way too old for me but I wanna try that dope she was getting. The stuff I’ve been getting lately is kinda weak. Turtleboy is probably somehow messing with it. I think he stole an almost full pack of smokes I had earlier too. My teeth hurt.

  • Bill Clinton
    May 19, 2021 at 3:37 am

    What a waste. That first picture of her in front of the house, she’s pretty decent looking. Of course can’t see what the rest of her looks like, but off the cuff she could have landed herself a decent man and had a good life for herself.

    Since she’s not opposed to breaking the law, I know how she can early an easy $20.

    • MGTOW TURTLES
      May 19, 2021 at 8:45 am

      A 20 shit you’re generous
      I wouldn’t even touch the bitch if I were Brett alone in the canoe
      Do none of you dudes have standards

      • Bill Clinton
        May 19, 2021 at 5:41 pm

        I’ve got standards….

        Female: Check
        Pulse: Check

        Good to go!

  • Death
    May 18, 2021 at 11:50 pm

    I’d like to know the age progression between pics 1 thru 3. It looks like 20-25, but I’m guessing 3 in Lowell

  • Who cares
    May 18, 2021 at 11:48 pm

    At least she’s not n!gger

  • Ginger guilty
    May 18, 2021 at 11:25 pm

    Ignore the died hair she’s a Ginger woman, no further questions your honor.

  • GoFundMe For My DUI School & Fines
    May 18, 2021 at 11:00 pm

    And oh yeah, a new car since insurance won’t cover that since I was under the influence! Yup, I intend to just walk away from this while everyone else foots the bill and does MY time. While all you suckers who have done far less take the bus. SEE YA!!

  • Peter Dautel
    Deez Nutz
    May 18, 2021 at 9:00 pm

    Surprised it’s taken this long for her to be TB famous given the rap sheet.

    Alas, Westerly… Where the dreams of the hard working folks of EB made a great small town, a conduit for the monied elite to bring in their problems.

  • MGTOW TURTLE
    May 18, 2021 at 8:55 pm

    O great another junky #singlemommy the world or the tax payer does not want but the world and the tax payer got anyway
    Isint liberalism and a government that let’s china send in fentanyl and encourages its use amongst its population just grand
    How many fucked up mental or emotional issues will that child have from being a fentanyl gremlin out of the Kunt womb never mind the fucked up mental problems and emotional issues that fentanyl gremlin will have in the years coming because there is no father in the house yay liberalism yay the welfare state yay feminaziism yay

    • MGTITS^^^
      May 19, 2021 at 1:11 am

      I still say you’re a virgin.

      • MCCUCK^^^
        May 19, 2021 at 8:08 am

        I still say you’re a junkie.

      • MGTOW TURTLE
        May 19, 2021 at 8:28 am

        What are you so uppity about you sound so mad why you so mad Jesus calm down you sound like you’re going to blow a gasket angry bird dont be mad at me because you’re some bitter old Kunt who hit the wall and went through life with no kids and no man and is now big mad because you’re fat have saggy tits a mustache and a pussy that fell out and now hangs down like a wizards sleeve
        But hey at least you have feminism your cats SSRI’s and boxed wine you washed up bitch whos going to die alone as a miserable Kunt with no man or children by her side because yay feminaziism
        How bad do you wish you could do something awful to me how bad do you wish you coukd shut me up and keep me from telling other mwn about the wahhhmens ya stupid washed up sow bitch
        You see boys this is what we call and angry liberal wahhhmen stay the hell away from them and not just because they smell like cat piss and tuna but because they are psychotic and angry all the time they are also parasites

        • Sweet insult BRO
          May 20, 2021 at 7:57 pm

          Nothing you said was coherent. Nothing. I’m guessing you were attempting to insult him? Next time, please at least try. Just TRY. Because what you said is just verbal diarrhea that wouldn’t insult a 3rd grader. Ok “BRO”? Thanks for the laugh though, but now I just kind of just feel bad for you.

      • DudeRanchStripClub (me/mine pronouns)
        May 19, 2021 at 10:14 am

        Correction: Gay Virgin

  • The Spic Tormentor
    Spic Tormentor
    May 18, 2021 at 8:12 pm

    She would be fun to beat senseless while she is all dopey and drooling on herself

    • Lame and Predictable
      May 18, 2021 at 8:45 pm

      beating women? pedophilia? spics? n!ggers? What will Diz joke about next!?!

      • Just kidding disclaimer:
        May 18, 2021 at 11:55 pm

        Satire, relax!

    • The Real ST
      May 18, 2021 at 11:29 pm

      You should invite her over. I’m sure she would love hanging out on your blow up mattress with Metallica bed sheets.

  • I’d chilidog her
    May 18, 2021 at 7:37 pm

    All her teeth and no bad tats….1st for a ratchet on Turtleboy.

  • Neo Classical Conservative
    May 18, 2021 at 7:33 pm

    I’ve dropped a hot loads of man chowder in that clam…
    She’s gonna be of the track for a week or so till that cheddar is spent. Hope she doesn’t get a hot dose of fentanyl. My balls will be blue and aching for her quahog by then.

  • Observer
    May 18, 2021 at 7:01 pm

    From the Boston Herald

    “Mikayla Miller’s death ruled suicide by Massachusetts chief medical examiner’s office”

  • Marty Feldman
    May 18, 2021 at 6:16 pm

    Beautiful Eyes

  • Inflamed Anus
    Inflamed Anus
    May 18, 2021 at 6:09 pm

    That’s unfortunate, it looks like she comes from a decent a family that really cares about her. Their enabling is what will end up killing her!

  • Ted Bundys VW
    May 18, 2021 at 5:25 pm

    I think I’m in Love…..

    • Captain Trips
      Ted Bundy's Crowbar
      May 18, 2021 at 6:35 pm

      I’m ready when you are!

  • MC Spammer
    May 18, 2021 at 5:18 pm

    I told Christina I wouldn’t cum in her mouth and I didn’t because I’m a gentleman. I just pulled it out and sprayed all over her face. Then I kicked her out of my car and made her take all the empty KFC containers.

  • WTF
    May 18, 2021 at 5:09 pm

    So, why would people like this ever change?

    • Boo Hoo
      8 years heroin-free
      May 18, 2021 at 6:20 pm

      That’s true, many don’t. And many make several attempts at getting clean. I have 8 years under my belt, and my life is finally on the track it should be. I hid my issues with addiction for so many years because of the stigma that comes with substance abuse. I just want you to remember that some people do change, and it’s not easy, for so many reasons, but feeling like you need to hide your past out of fear of judgement shouldn’t be part of it. I have no idea if this chick will change, and I’m leaning towards “not for now” because of her family enabling her so much.

      • WTF
        May 18, 2021 at 6:33 pm

        I can’t quit nicotine. Glad I never had any heroin.

        • Boo Hoo
          8 years heroin-free
          May 18, 2021 at 10:06 pm

          Quit opiates 8 years ago, but it took until last year to quit cigarettes. It’s true what they say about nicotine being as bad as dope.

          • Stephanie Sadowski Adams
            May 19, 2021 at 10:16 am

            you’re a weak bitch that needs constant reinforcement, you’ll always be a loser

          • Boo Hoo
            8 years heroin-free
            May 19, 2021 at 11:39 am

            I have no idea who that Stephanie bitch is trying to call me weak, but she doesn’t know my life, what I’ve been through, and what I’ve accomplished. I’m really wondering why she’s so butt hurt. Maybe she’s using. So many people do. I have an awesome family and a great career. I’m not ashamed of my past, and I know exactly how strong I am.

  • I went to school with her
    May 18, 2021 at 4:57 pm

    She had nudes and a BJ video going around. I jerked off to them quite a few times.

    • Alexander Rich-Shea
      I went to school with you
      May 18, 2021 at 5:01 pm

      You used to cum in my mouth and then lick your cum off my tongue and eat it.

      • I went to school with her
        May 18, 2021 at 5:06 pm

        Nothing wrong with that.

        • Driver's Ed teacher
          May 18, 2021 at 7:05 pm

          I remember you, man you were good at working the stick!

  • Honky Tormentor
    May 18, 2021 at 4:30 pm

    Looks like Anna Kendrick on crack. I’d still smash.

  • Daniel Crowell
    Lance Bolt
    May 18, 2021 at 4:25 pm

    Nice ass

  • Dump 'em out...
    May 18, 2021 at 4:10 pm

    Both of them.

  • Professor Fuckface
    May 18, 2021 at 4:02 pm

    She’s a Warwick 30. This broad was rode hard and put away wet.

  • Dick LaBone
    May 18, 2021 at 3:45 pm

    Rarest of the female species, the hot redhead. What a waste of life…

  • Judge Dread
    May 18, 2021 at 3:39 pm

    5.5k? Those are rookie numbers for a gofundme scam. i’m not a big go fund me scam guy though, I’m more into pretending to be a woman so I can give straight men blowjobs. I’m more into that type of scam.

  • RobertI
    May 18, 2021 at 3:32 pm

    How is she not in jail?

    • Duh
      May 18, 2021 at 3:59 pm

      White priviledge in action.

      • FUCK YOU
        May 18, 2021 at 10:00 pm

        You can bet her defense usually centers around the following rhetoric:
        She comes from a good, civic-minded family with ties to the community. Her parents are committed to helping turn her life around.
        Anybody else would be thrown UNDER the jail, no questions asked, no Mass Bail Fund.

        • Fuck Yaself, It’s Cheaper^^^
          May 19, 2021 at 1:21 am

          Hey, asshole, you forgot to say “#Racism”… you circled and circled the drain, but….

          Your posts suck. Fuck right off.

    • @Robertl^^^
      May 19, 2021 at 1:24 am

      I can answer that in three vowels: “Turd-Cutter”

      • Dana MacIntyre (cocksucker)
        May 19, 2021 at 10:22 am

        stink whistle

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