Turtleboy Ratchet Madness Round 2: Trap Queen Region – Vote For Which Ratchets Should Advance To The Sweet 16
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The results of the second round of voting in the Chudstuffer Region of Turtleboy Ratchet Madness is completed. Here are the four ratchets who will advance to the Sweet 16:
Down goes Celia!!! You people amaze me. I thought for sure she was going to the Final Four. Then again Heather Philip is pretty damn ratchet. She was a cop killer’s sperm sponge and sells drugs around her children. She is the lowest of the low. Can’t go wrong with her in the Sweet 16. Boo Shameek’s magical Cinderella story continues as the 15 seed cruised to the next round, along with Sarah Burke and the Uxbridge gypsy pastors. Gonna be interesting to see who advances out of this bracket. Here’s what it looks like now:
Onto the final region before we begin the Sweet 16 – the Trap Queen Region……
As usual we will be providing a brief overview of the ratchet things these slugrakes did to make it this far. We also include a link to a blog on each of them if you’d like to make a more informed decision. With that said, here’s our four matchups for today…..
Mariah and the Webster hoodrats have been on several Turtleboy blogs for a variety of things including, squatting in motels, cutting dicks off, fighting the Webster cops, doing NECN interviews in which they demand the Webster cops all be fired, and excessive amounts of “free my boi” posts and flat brimmed Chicago Bulls hats. Meanwhile Misti and Jason Iorio are two of the most fucked up people who have ever lived, and they may have impregnated a mentally challenged woman, taken her baby, and forced her to call them Mom and Dad. Oh, and Jason pretends to be a veteran while Misti tried to profit off the deaths of two little girls in an Orange fire.
It doesn’t get much more ratchet than stealing lube and vibrators from a CVS for your inevitable motel gangbang. Especially when you’re a tribe of junkies who have been arrested a million times before and live in Ware. Then again it’s not every day you see some cheesehog with a 420 tattoo on her head begging for money so she can get the tattoo removed from her head.
3. Brockton no-tip trap queen vs. 6. Fall River Guttermuppet
The only thing more ratchet than being a failed singer who refuses to tip at restaurants is going onto the Brockton Hub and explaining to the world (who didn’t ask what your thoughts were to begin with) why you don’t tip, and how the next waiter who has the misfortune of serving you will be told at the beginning of the meal that they will not be tipped. On the other hand losing your kids to DCF due to neglect and then starting a GoFundMe to feed your habit, but doing so under the guise of helping your children, gets you labeled as a Guttermuppet.
The NB Foodstampopatums family got our attention with the 10 seconds of most ratchet behavior ever recorded as they yelled racial slurs at the New Bedford Guide while going full free my boi. Mel Taylor’s ratchetry has been repeated and documented. From the time he threatened to murder the hoodat who punched his 16 year old ratchetling daughter after she punched him several times, to the dildo pics he sent the elderly couple with Alzheimer’s who he ripped off and never did contracting work for. He is a ratchet legend.
Tough decisions folks. You have 24 hours to vote before we announce the winners. Then on Tuesday the Sweet 16 beings. Who’s gonna win this whole thing?
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