Smiles And Sunshine

The 2017 Turtleboy Naughty List #100-91

The 2017 Turtleboy Naughty List #100-91

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Merry Christmas Turtle Riders!! For a special Christmas treat we’re counting down the 100 naughtiest Turtleboy famous slugpumps, fupasloths, and cheesehogs from 2017. Here’s #100-91…..


100. Salisbury Sea Cow

When you drive around with your 3 year old in the backseat doing lines at 3 AM, and then go full free my boi for a guy who was just arrested for murdering someone, you’re gonna end up on Turtleboy. It’s a guarantee.



99. Fake Indian IG Model With Fake Dead Triplets

Junkbox? Check. Pretends to be Indian? Check. Bootleg Instagram model? Check. Pretended to lose triplets in order to raise cash for a GoFundMe, but then forgot to realize that your timeline is all fucked up? Check. The only thing she’s getting from Santa this year is AIDS.



98. Jason Marchand

If you try to fuck over the working girl by inviting her over for drinks and shots, and then leave without telling her, we will find out who you are. And so will Santa.

Screen Shot 2017-01-18 at 9.13.27 PM



97. Southbridge Cholestorocerous

There’s scamming contractors, and then there’s lowlife maggots like this, who steal money from family’s of disabled children they claim they’re going to build a pool for, and also raise money for cancer patients and pocket all the cash.


Screen Shot 2017-04-12 at 11.07.49 AM Screen Shot 2017-04-12 at 11.07.55 AM


96. Blimpzillia steals someone else’s stillborn pics and pretends they’re her stillborn

The worst part about this psycho? Her whole motive was attention. No GoFundMe scams. Just straight up stole someone else’s tragedy and passed it off as her own for some Facebook likes.



95. Leominster’s Most Wanted Taunts Cops On Facebook

When you taunt the Leominster Police on their Facebook page and then they find you, the only thing you can do is post some jailhouse pictures on Facebook.



94. Brockton Fupajuicer

If you’ve been blackmailing your diddler husband for years in order to stay silent on his pedophilia, you probably shouldn’t announce it to the Brockton Hub when he stops paying.



93. Sideshow Knobjob

Because apparently abusing someone else’s child is funny when you’re a career loser.



92. Bank Veskovich

There’s always that one guy who leaves his dog in a parked car on a 90 degree day. When you’re driving a BMW and you own your own local business, it’s not gonna help your bottom line.



91. Dalton Bermingham AKA Assquatch

Professional Facebook bad ass reemerges months after we blogged about him, without pants, walking aimlessly in the Plympton woods.




8 Comment(s)
  • festivus
    December 25, 2017 at 1:33 pm

    but that’s not dalton, his sister was joking

  • TJB
    December 25, 2017 at 11:13 am

    Merry Christmas, TB. May 2018 bring another year of fupasloths & birdbrain’s.

    • festivus
      December 25, 2017 at 1:40 pm

      nooooo no more fupasloths!!! merry Christmas turtle and turtlefam

  • Burt Hurtensteiner
    December 25, 2017 at 8:54 am

    Oh come on TBS! “Fake Indian IG Model” should be top 5. Top 10 at least.

    Separately, have you considered a blog about Aidan Kearney? Think about it, most of the folks you blog about claim Aidan is TBS. We know that is false. Think about the “shock” value of a blog on Aidan. It could bring back those 80K+ “missing” turtle riders 🙂


    Burt Hurtensteiner

  • Damn Straight
    December 25, 2017 at 8:42 am

    You should rename this list top 100 reasons why nobody comes to Turtleboy anymore.

    • Burt Hurtensteiner
      December 25, 2017 at 8:58 am

      …but you are here

    • And here you are
      December 25, 2017 at 9:10 am

      Thanks you for visiting Each time you click, we get paid. #Toodles

    • Burt Hurtensteiner
      December 25, 2017 at 9:19 am

      Hey TBS deleted my post. When did TBS start moderating and deleting comments they do not like? Has Zuckerberg purchased TBS? #FreemuhspeechZuck

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