Smiles And Sunshine

Turtleboy’s 2016 Naughty List #50-26

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Editor’s Note: Jorge Zambrano and David Njuguna both killed police officers this year. We kept them off this list because Turtleboy is all about the satire. What these two pieces of garbage did cannot be satirized. 

This year we have chronicled an epidemic of naughtiness on Turtleboy Sports. And since today is Christmas Eve it’s time to announce our naughty list for 2016, to see who’s earned a big lump of coal in their stocking from Santa Turtleboy. There’s sooooo many to choose from, so we had to shorten the list down to 125, which we will be breaking down into five parts in our countdown to see who was the naughtiest of them all this year. Since we don’t really have the time to explain what each and every one of these slug rakes did to earn their way onto our naughty list, we summed it up with a simple Haiku for each, as well as a link to the blogs about them so you can relive their naughtiness. Here’s #50-26!!

50. Vincent Lomba

Biggest dick ever

Hits chick on MBTA

Turtleboy finds him

Fox 25 Reported Our Story On The MBTA Nudnik Who Assaulted A Woman And Now The Cops Are Looking To Arrest Him


49. Grafton life coach Jessica Curtis

Blue ribbons racist

According to this life coach

How is that a job?

Grafton “Life Coach” Wants Town To Take Down Blue Ribbons Because Supporting The Police Is Racist And Divisive


48. Sharinna Travieso

Says she is artist

Shuts down speech she does not like

Worcester’s biggest fraud

Wannabe “Artist” Reported TBS For Calling Her Dumb Statement Dumb And Got Us Suspended 30 Days



47. Turners Falls padded room Nazis

Whiny bitch parents

Complain about calm down room

Please shut the fuck up

Moronic Turner Falls Parents Of Dangerous Kids Who Intentionally Hurt Themselves In “Calm Down Room” Are Suing Elementary School

Colrain Hippie Makes Up Story About Elementary School Padded Cell In Turner Falls And Hippies Lose Their Minds


46. Ceyharra Robinson – no tip Brockton trap queen

Brockton chick don’t tip

Thanks for letting us all know

Hope they spit in food

Ratchet Brockton Trap Queen Says She Never Tips At Restaurants Because She Didn’t Ask For A Waiter, Dumpster Fire Ensues


45. The MIAA

Biggest bunch of dicks

Look for ways to punish kids

Brought poor kid to court

Shepherd Hill Football Player Kevin Mensah Can’t Play All Season, Losing D1 Scholarship Offers Because Holy Name Administrators, MIAA Don’t Care About Kids


44. Centro Los Americas

Shady non-profit

Blowing money on golf trips

Gets caught, plays race card

Turtleboy Effect: Audit Shows Juan Gomez, Centro Los Americas “Non-Profit” Spent $6 Million Taxpayer Cash On Booze, Puerto Rico Trips, Golf, Jeeps, Baby Showers, And Other Illegal Things


43. Courthouse jumper

Dont’ wnat to tuck shirt

Let’s find out if I can fly

Nope, turns out I can’t

Courthouse Jumper Was Angry Judge Made Him Tuck His Shirt In So Stop Whining About Turtleboy Being Mean


42. Tchenavia So’Juicii Stallworth

Ratchet ass mother

Makes kid cry on video

Cuz he voted Trump

Woman Abuses Child On Video Because He Voted For President-Elect Donald Trump In Schoolwide Election


41. Sean Bohadiewicz

Dry humps the sitter

Fired as firefighter

So, sells Hatchimals

Disgraced Babysitter Ass-Grabbing Former Shrewsbury Firefighter Is Back On Facebook And Selling Hatchimals For $250 A Pop

The Ass-Grabbing, 15 Year Old Dry-Humping Shrewsbury Firefighter Resigned Because He’s Really Bad At Cheating


40. Ware Vibrator Bandits

Two guys and one chick

Looking to have a good time

But don’t want to pay

Three Of Ware’s Finest Rob West Springfield CVS Of KY Lube And Vibrators For Wild Night In The 413


39. Moses Dixon

Beats up his girlfriend

Calls up his Uncle Jimmy

Record gets erased

State Rep Candidate Moses Dixon Was Charged With Assault And Battery On A Woman, Records Have Disappeared From The Courthouse And He Is Endorsed By Powerful Politicians


38. Josh Swalec

Trolls advertisers

Gets taste of own medicine

Big mistake fuck boi

Guy Who Posted Negative Reviews On Turtleboy Advertisers And Circus Freak Friends Are Whining That Turtle Riders Have Flooded His Business Page With Negative Reviews


37. Durfee High School parents

Wants kids out of school

Ratchet behavior ensues

Welcome to the Riv

All-Star Fall River Parents Try To Start A Riot At Durfee High School After Kid Snapchats A Gun At School, Legendary Facebook Commentary Ensues

One Of The Durfee Fall River Rat Parent Mob Is A Convicted Felon, Anti-Vaxxers Threaten TB With Internet Lawsuits Galore


36. Hampshire College

Not a real college

Anti-American cucks

Run for their safe space

Hampshire College Student Threatening To Attack Any Classmates Who Voted For Trump And Won’t Give Her Reparations On PayPal

Triggered Hampshire College Students Run To The Cops After Being Confronted By Scary American Flags

SJW Graduation Speaker Shits All Over His School In The Most Emasculating Speech Of All Time


35. Liz Costa

Loses all 4 kids

For being degenerate

Begs for drug money




34. Mambo Drink

Ruined Water Street

Cuz they’re a hoodrat magnet

Whips out the race card

These World Star Calibar Water Street Fights Are The Reason Why Turtleboy Doesn’t Miss Going Out On Friday Nights Anymore

Police Report Reveals Mambo Served 17 And 20 Year Olds, Was Over Capacity, And Everyone Involved In 100 Person Knife And Bat Fight Was A Patron

Mambo Drinks Mafia Showed Up In Wife Beaters To Intimidate Canal District Meeting From Criticizing Them And It Worked Perfectly


33. Carla Darosa

Hits her kids teacher

Rules don’t apply to trap queens

Perfectly normal

All-Star Brockton Mom Barges Into School, Tries To Fight Teacher, Tells Her She’s Going To “Fuck Her Up,” Gets Arrested, Says It’s All A Misunderstanding


32. Andrea Gialtouridis

Yells at Trump voters

Dad is a Trump donor

Exposed as huge fraud

Trump Protesting Clark Chick Who Called Main South Activists Racist Is The Daughter Of A Millionaire Trump Donor From Westwood


31. Amanda Lacroix

Such a grimy chick

Shocked that she is from Southbridge

Still collects welfare

Southbridge Ratchet Took Down GoFundMe, Collected SSI While Having Active Warrant Out For Her Arrest And All Her Kids Were In DCF Custody

Southbridge Woman On SSI Begging For Money To Fix BF’s Car Had A Baby Die Due To Neglect, Three Other Kids Found Covered In Feces And Fleas By Neighbors


30. Judge Andrew Mandell

Let Zambrano go

Who then kills an Auburn cop

Nice going moron

Judge Andrew Mandell Could Have Kept Ron Tarentino Alive But He Was Dumb Enough To Believe That Jorge Zambrano Would Turn His Life Around


29. Kevin Blackmer

Ware degenrate

Doesn’t know how to shut up

Got strip club shut down

TB Hall Of Shame Inductee: Kevin Blackmer From Ware Is Happy That 49 Gay People Were Killed In Orlando


28. Karey Carner – Winchendon trashbag Mom

Fights a kid in school

Tells her parents don’t love her

Thinks this is normal

Winchendon Mom Who Fought 16 Year Old Murdock Student Once Confronted A Man At The Dollar Tree For Pushing A Teenager

Winchendon Hoodrat Mom Fights 16 Year Old Student At Murdock High School After Telling Her That Her Parents Don’t Love Her


27. Sammie Holland

Internet beggar

Feeds son only McDonalds

Because, fuck working

Sammie Holland Bought A New Car And Put Bogus GoFundMe Back Up


26. Jerrell Sciarra

Looks like he’s forty

Gets expelled over a girl

But chick still dumps him

Meet Jerell Sciarra – The Auburn High School Savage Who Viciously Attacked And Beat Another Student In School On Camera





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9 Comment(s)
    December 24, 2016 at 9:58 pm

    If my name hits this list Turtleboy is all done. The only reason that turtlebitch hasn’t been suspended in a month is because they have pulled the racism back a bit.

    Continue to be nice and you can keep your blog so all you insecure people can bash others on your bandwagon, I see now you have manufactured stories such as the beastiality piece which is just beyond comprehension. I did find you people from the blog listed on that fake site as friends as you crafted the story, typically not credible reporting from the circus of morons at Turtlebitch sports.

    • BobnMic
      December 24, 2016 at 10:47 pm

      Hey Kevin I love your posts. Do you want to hook up in a private chat room with me?

    • Wabbitt
      December 25, 2016 at 1:43 pm

      You’ll be in the top ten, and you won’t do jack shit but spam the report button, you murdering closet case with shit taste in haberdashery.

  • Turd Burglestein
    December 24, 2016 at 9:28 pm


    December 24, 2016 at 8:27 pm

    It is sad that many turtlebitches have gone back into their shells.

    Bret the killer Killoran. Matty Moe Moe is really a jellyfish who wants to be a turtleboy. Margaret Melican has lost her touch. Aiden Kearney is in divorce proceedings as his wife found out about the christian young man he has been wrestling with.

    The rest are afraid to do battle online as they support Matty Mo Mo blocking me from posting.

    Unblock me and I will not have your page suspended thru the New Year. I will also tell you who placed the white hood on your blessed statute.

    • December 24, 2016 at 9:33 pm

      Hey Kev
      Yo, momma is a fat lazy slob, FACT!

        December 24, 2016 at 9:49 pm

        You ignorant pos coward jellyfish stalking slime ball slug. I don’t give a fuck if you were trump himself as if you EVER stated that to my face I will rip yours off.
        But you will not reveal who you are because you know I am serious. You are nothing but a coward, a scared kitty who hidestroyed behind fake names. Listen here you needle dick the bug fucking punk bitch.
        You are fucking with the wrong one and I think that is why you hide like a sissy.

        • Turd Burglestein
          December 25, 2016 at 5:08 am

          Go fuck off somewhere else and have yourself a shitty drunk cracked out Crimmas…you little midget fag.

        • Wabbitt
          December 25, 2016 at 1:41 pm

          Murderer say what?

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