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Everett Oxygoblin Steals Donation Bin From Malden Burger King Parking Lot Intended To Support Local Schools, Forgets That It Won’t Fit In His Car, Drives Off With It Anyway

Uncle Turtleboy / June 26, 2018

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Serial Lowell Police Harasser Kyle Shockley Filming Police Just Standing There Calling Them Corrupt Then Calls For Their Help After Being Assaulted

Uncle Turtleboy / June 25, 2018

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As Much As We Hate Charlie Baker The Groping Incident Involving His Son And A Plus Sized Woman Yelling #MeToo On A Plane Just Doesn’t Pass The Smell Test

Uncle Turtleboy / June 25, 2018

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Malden Meat Pirate Arrested In Boston Police Station For Stealing Purse After Being Released For Shoplifting Arrest Is Looking For OCs On Facebook And Wants You To Know About Her Hep-C Appointment

Uncle Turtleboy / June 25, 2018

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Brockton Assrag Junkbox Who Killed Father Of 3 Driving 80 MPH While Banged Up On A Test Drive Chucks Bird At Arraignment, Teen Mom Army Rushes To His Defense

Uncle Turtleboy / June 22, 2018

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MBTA Cops Now Looking For Manbun McGee After We Exposed Him In MBTA Beating Of Disabled Elderly Man, Insane Camerawoman Says Turtleboy Is The Devil And She’s Gonna Get Us

Uncle Turtleboy / June 21, 2018

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Other Rockland Selectman Rumored To Be Smashing Bobbin For Boners Deirdre Hall Lost His Mind At Board Of Selectman Meeting, Stands By His “After David, And It Was Fantastic Theater

Uncle Turtleboy / June 20, 2018

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Peabody Serial Rapist Walks Free After Victim Dies, Is Found To Be “Uncontrollable Danger”,Isn’t Found In Registry And Has POF Profile “Looking To Get Married”

Uncle Turtleboy / June 19, 2018

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Blackstone Baboon Does Some Day Time Drunk Driving In Shrewsbury With Unsecured 6 Week Old Baby In Back Seat, Smashes Into Route 9 Barrier, Throws Straw-Ber-Itas Out Window At Traffic

Uncle Turtleboy / June 19, 2018

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Arkansas Renta Placenta Threatens Local Mother After Her Needle Infested Camp In Harwich Gets Shared On Facebook

Uncle Turtleboy / June 19, 2018

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Webster Rapper’s Brother Accurately Predicts Turtleboy Debut When He Spends Father Day With Pa Dukes And Big Bro In Jail Cell After Crack House Gets Busted And Dad Fights Cops At WPD Station With Car Full Of Crack Cocaine

Uncle Turtleboy / June 18, 2018

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24 Hours After We Called Out The Red Line Vigilante Who Beat The Shit Out Of An Elderly Man For Imaginary Upskirting He Was Arrested By MBTA Police

Uncle Turtleboy / June 15, 2018

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Chicken Pox Charlie Cements Status As Resident West Boylston Gangsta By Threatening Someone With A Toy Gun In Middle Of Town Common

Uncle Turtleboy / June 14, 2018

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Ghanarea Gary Arrested For Stalking For The Billionth Time In Worcester, Shrewsbury, Millbury, And Hopkinton, Follows Women Home, Pees In Cups, Convinced No Means Yes And Every Woman Wants His Hog

Uncle Turtleboy / June 12, 2018

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“Reformed” Killer Kevin Lynch Was Arrested Again For Disorderly Conduct And Resisting Arrest, Because People Who Murder Other People Cannot Be Fixed

Uncle Turtleboy / June 12, 2018

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Eye Witnesses: Muff Daddy Made Up The Malden Dockside Hate Crime, Threw A Shot Glass At A Dude’s Head, Then Started A Fight And Muff Buffer Told The Cops She’s Not Really A Lezzy

Uncle Turtleboy / June 12, 2018

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And Just Like That We’ve Got Red Line Queef Cake #4, Wanted For Beating A Dude So Badly That He Had To Go To The Hospital

Uncle Turtleboy / June 11, 2018

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Here’s 2 More Of The Red Line Queef Cakes Wanted For Assault and Battery, Father Of First Suspect Is Going “Free My Son” To Maria Stephanos On Facebook

Uncle Turtleboy / June 11, 2018

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Salisbury Chowder Pump Sexually Harasses Woman For Months With Offers Of Schlong Jelly Churning Videos, Turns Out He’s Been Arrested For Attempted Murder Of Ex-Girlfriend

Uncle Turtleboy / June 11, 2018

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They Caught One Of The Queef Cakes Who Jumped The Guy Defending His Girlfriend On The Red Line And We Were All Wrong About What Town He’s From, Let’s Find The Other 3

Uncle Turtleboy / June 11, 2018

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Everett Oxygoblin Steals Donation Bin From Malden Burger King Parking Lot Intended To Support Local Schools, Forgets That It Won’t Fit In His Car, Drives Off With It Anyway

Serial Lowell Police Harasser Kyle Shockley Filming Police Just Standing There Calling Them Corrupt Then Calls For Their Help After Being Assaulted

As Much As We Hate Charlie Baker The Groping Incident Involving His Son And A Plus Sized Woman Yelling #MeToo On A Plane Just Doesn’t Pass The Smell Test

Malden Meat Pirate Arrested In Boston Police Station For Stealing Purse After Being Released For Shoplifting Arrest Is Looking For OCs On Facebook And Wants You To Know About Her Hep-C Appointment

Brockton Assrag Junkbox Who Killed Father Of 3 Driving 80 MPH While Banged Up On A Test Drive Chucks Bird At Arraignment, Teen Mom Army Rushes To His Defense

Subscribe to Turtleboy Sports

MBTA Cops Now Looking For Manbun McGee After We Exposed Him In MBTA Beating Of Disabled Elderly Man, Insane Camerawoman Says Turtleboy Is The Devil And She’s Gonna Get Us

Other Rockland Selectman Rumored To Be Smashing Bobbin For Boners Deirdre Hall Lost His Mind At Board Of Selectman Meeting, Stands By His “After David, And It Was Fantastic Theater

Peabody Serial Rapist Walks Free After Victim Dies, Is Found To Be “Uncontrollable Danger”,Isn’t Found In Registry And Has POF Profile “Looking To Get Married”

Blackstone Baboon Does Some Day Time Drunk Driving In Shrewsbury With Unsecured 6 Week Old Baby In Back Seat, Smashes Into Route 9 Barrier, Throws Straw-Ber-Itas Out Window At Traffic

Arkansas Renta Placenta Threatens Local Mother After Her Needle Infested Camp In Harwich Gets Shared On Facebook

Subscribe to Turtleboy Sports

Webster Rapper’s Brother Accurately Predicts Turtleboy Debut When He Spends Father Day With Pa Dukes And Big Bro In Jail Cell After Crack House Gets Busted And Dad Fights Cops At WPD Station With Car Full Of Crack Cocaine

24 Hours After We Called Out The Red Line Vigilante Who Beat The Shit Out Of An Elderly Man For Imaginary Upskirting He Was Arrested By MBTA Police

Chicken Pox Charlie Cements Status As Resident West Boylston Gangsta By Threatening Someone With A Toy Gun In Middle Of Town Common

Ghanarea Gary Arrested For Stalking For The Billionth Time In Worcester, Shrewsbury, Millbury, And Hopkinton, Follows Women Home, Pees In Cups, Convinced No Means Yes And Every Woman Wants His Hog

“Reformed” Killer Kevin Lynch Was Arrested Again For Disorderly Conduct And Resisting Arrest, Because People Who Murder Other People Cannot Be Fixed

Subscribe to Turtleboy Sports

Eye Witnesses: Muff Daddy Made Up The Malden Dockside Hate Crime, Threw A Shot Glass At A Dude’s Head, Then Started A Fight And Muff Buffer Told The Cops She’s Not Really A Lezzy

And Just Like That We’ve Got Red Line Queef Cake #4, Wanted For Beating A Dude So Badly That He Had To Go To The Hospital

Here’s 2 More Of The Red Line Queef Cakes Wanted For Assault and Battery, Father Of First Suspect Is Going “Free My Son” To Maria Stephanos On Facebook

Salisbury Chowder Pump Sexually Harasses Woman For Months With Offers Of Schlong Jelly Churning Videos, Turns Out He’s Been Arrested For Attempted Murder Of Ex-Girlfriend

They Caught One Of The Queef Cakes Who Jumped The Guy Defending His Girlfriend On The Red Line And We Were All Wrong About What Town He’s From, Let’s Find The Other 3

Subscribe to Turtleboy Sports

All-Star Criminals

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