All-Star Criminals

Cornbread Coochstain Smashes Into Easthampton K9 Unit During Second DUI, Gets Released On $40 Personal Recognizance, Says He “Wishes A Mother Fucker Would” Underestimate Him

Uncle Turtleboy / October 25, 2018

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Barney Trouble Steals Rocks From Westport Stonewall On Multiple Occasions To Build A Coi Pond, Doesn’t Realize That Rocks Are Free In Woods

Uncle Turtleboy / October 25, 2018

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All-Star Criminals

Mom Defends Gothface Killah On Palmer PD Facebook Page After He Threatens To Shoot Up The High School Just 18 Months After Threatening To Shoot Up Pathfinder Vocational High School

Western Mass Turtlegirl / October 24, 2018

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Stabby McPsychopath Assaults Middleboro Homeowners During Home Invasion, Doesn’t Seem To Be A Stranger To Prison, Gets Picked Up By Cops Despite Writing “I’m Still Free” On Facebook And Is Now Doing 6 Years As Someone’s Pretty Lady In Jail

Uncle Turtleboy / October 24, 2018

Stabby McPsychopath Assaults Middleboro Homeowners During Home Invasion, Doesn’t Seem To Be A Stranger To Prison, Gets Picked Up By…

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All-Star Criminals

Corrupt Firefighter’s Union Spits In The Face Of Law Enforcement By Endorsing Cop Hating Trashbag Elizabeth Warren, Corrupt DA Joe Early, And Anti-Gun Maura Healey

Uncle Turtleboy / October 24, 2018

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All-Star Criminals

Gina “Fleestone Light” Giovangelo, Who Can’t Drive Because She Killed A Woman While Drunk In 2010 And Recently Led Cops On 6 Day Manhunt, Is Looking For Free Baby Shit In Wellesley Because Two Raw Dog Trophies Isn’t Enough

Uncle Turtleboy / October 23, 2018

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We Found The Bush Baron’s Facebook Page And Oh My Stars It’s Like We Won Ratchet Bingo

Uncle Turtleboy / October 19, 2018

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Salem MA Can Sleep Soundly Knowing Bush Baron Won’t Be Snatching Their Rhododendrons, Plant Thief Got Schooled By The System

Uncle Turtleboy / October 19, 2018

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If You Know Who This Beer Bandit Is Stealing 5 Cases Of Bud Light At Once From An Arlington Liquor Store Don’t Call The Cops Because He’s An American Hero

Uncle Turtleboy / October 18, 2018

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Best Protesters Ever Have Finally Shut Down Laughlin Kennel Puppy Mill Once And For All

Uncle Turtleboy / October 15, 2018

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Pervy Pinterest Nudist And Sex Offender Abidan Rivera Has A Thing For Flashing Children In Stores Repeatedly, Massachusetts Judges Decide That’s Just Fine By Them Because The MA Justice System Is A Joke

Uncle Turtleboy / October 12, 2018

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Vietschlong Ex Gf Tosses Molotov Cocktail Under Vehicle, Forgets That You’re Supposed To Light It On Fire, And All To Win Back Nashua Gutterpube With Record Of Hitting Kids

Uncle Turtleboy / October 11, 2018

Vietschlong Ex Gf Tosses Molotov Cocktail Under Vehicle, Forgets That You’re Supposed To Light It On Fire, And All To…

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All-Star Criminals

Fall River’s Baby Faced Boner Champ Mayor Is In Jail For Defrauding Investors With Stupid App No One Wanted While Living Pimp Daddy Lifestyle Like He’s Mayor Of A Real City

Uncle Turtleboy / October 11, 2018

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All-Star Criminals

Bootleg Mr. Clean Who Smashed A Glass Over A Dude’s Head In A Methuen Bar And Ran Like A Bitch Got Out Of Jail A Few Years Ago For Gambling Rings And Selling E

Uncle Turtleboy / October 10, 2018

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Waltham Womb Raider And Skinny Jeaned Sauce Donkey Beat Up 3 Elderly People At Their Home In Watertown, Proclaim Innocence On Facebook

Uncle Turtleboy / October 8, 2018

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Bootleg Breeder Burned A Puppy With Bacon Grease, Claims It Was An Accident But Still Doesn’t Bring Dog To A Vet Because That’s Not Shady

Uncle Turtleboy / October 3, 2018

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Foodstamp Friday: Hartford Hoodbooger Addition, Star Buckz Is On The Lookout For The Plug Instead Of Getting Arrested At Casinos Today And His Friend Is Gonna Report Turtleboy To The Internet Police

Uncle Turtleboy / October 2, 2018

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Taunton Grundle Smears Lock Their Kids In Cages And Sexually Assault Them, Protect Their Section 8 Ratchet Den Like The Alamo When Police And DCF Show Up, Then Assault A Cop

Uncle Turtleboy / October 1, 2018

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Westfield Tunaflap Tornado And Pubeface Petey Rob Multiple Stores At Gunpoint With Infant In Backseat But It’s OK Because She’s Getting Clean And They’re In Open Relationship

Uncle Turtleboy / September 28, 2018

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State Senate Candidate Tom Merolli And Southbridge Town Councilor Kristen Auclair Caught Trespassing And Potentially Playing Bury The Broomstick Past Midnight In Southbridge Park

Uncle Turtleboy / September 27, 2018

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Cornbread Coochstain Smashes Into Easthampton K9 Unit During Second DUI, Gets Released On $40 Personal Recognizance, Says He “Wishes A Mother Fucker Would” Underestimate Him

Barney Trouble Steals Rocks From Westport Stonewall On Multiple Occasions To Build A Coi Pond, Doesn’t Realize That Rocks Are Free In Woods

Mom Defends Gothface Killah On Palmer PD Facebook Page After He Threatens To Shoot Up The High School Just 18 Months After Threatening To Shoot Up Pathfinder Vocational High School

Stabby McPsychopath Assaults Middleboro Homeowners During Home Invasion, Doesn’t Seem To Be A Stranger To Prison, Gets Picked Up By Cops Despite Writing “I’m Still Free” On Facebook And Is Now Doing 6 Years As Someone’s Pretty Lady In Jail

Corrupt Firefighter’s Union Spits In The Face Of Law Enforcement By Endorsing Cop Hating Trashbag Elizabeth Warren, Corrupt DA Joe Early, And Anti-Gun Maura Healey

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Gina “Fleestone Light” Giovangelo, Who Can’t Drive Because She Killed A Woman While Drunk In 2010 And Recently Led Cops On 6 Day Manhunt, Is Looking For Free Baby Shit In Wellesley Because Two Raw Dog Trophies Isn’t Enough

We Found The Bush Baron’s Facebook Page And Oh My Stars It’s Like We Won Ratchet Bingo

Salem MA Can Sleep Soundly Knowing Bush Baron Won’t Be Snatching Their Rhododendrons, Plant Thief Got Schooled By The System

If You Know Who This Beer Bandit Is Stealing 5 Cases Of Bud Light At Once From An Arlington Liquor Store Don’t Call The Cops Because He’s An American Hero

Best Protesters Ever Have Finally Shut Down Laughlin Kennel Puppy Mill Once And For All

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Pervy Pinterest Nudist And Sex Offender Abidan Rivera Has A Thing For Flashing Children In Stores Repeatedly, Massachusetts Judges Decide That’s Just Fine By Them Because The MA Justice System Is A Joke

Vietschlong Ex Gf Tosses Molotov Cocktail Under Vehicle, Forgets That You’re Supposed To Light It On Fire, And All To Win Back Nashua Gutterpube With Record Of Hitting Kids

Fall River’s Baby Faced Boner Champ Mayor Is In Jail For Defrauding Investors With Stupid App No One Wanted While Living Pimp Daddy Lifestyle Like He’s Mayor Of A Real City

Bootleg Mr. Clean Who Smashed A Glass Over A Dude’s Head In A Methuen Bar And Ran Like A Bitch Got Out Of Jail A Few Years Ago For Gambling Rings And Selling E

Waltham Womb Raider And Skinny Jeaned Sauce Donkey Beat Up 3 Elderly People At Their Home In Watertown, Proclaim Innocence On Facebook

Subscribe to Turtleboy Sports

Bootleg Breeder Burned A Puppy With Bacon Grease, Claims It Was An Accident But Still Doesn’t Bring Dog To A Vet Because That’s Not Shady

Foodstamp Friday: Hartford Hoodbooger Addition, Star Buckz Is On The Lookout For The Plug Instead Of Getting Arrested At Casinos Today And His Friend Is Gonna Report Turtleboy To The Internet Police

Taunton Grundle Smears Lock Their Kids In Cages And Sexually Assault Them, Protect Their Section 8 Ratchet Den Like The Alamo When Police And DCF Show Up, Then Assault A Cop

Westfield Tunaflap Tornado And Pubeface Petey Rob Multiple Stores At Gunpoint With Infant In Backseat But It’s OK Because She’s Getting Clean And They’re In Open Relationship

State Senate Candidate Tom Merolli And Southbridge Town Councilor Kristen Auclair Caught Trespassing And Potentially Playing Bury The Broomstick Past Midnight In Southbridge Park

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All-Star Criminals

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